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Post by wendyihts on Jun 30, 2008 15:22:28 GMT 1
LOL I was going to say 'what a wonderful set of strengths you have there Wendymp!' and they ARE wonderful strengths - but the thing I love so much about this area of psychology is that all the Strengths are, of course, wonderful ;D I love how this stuff just highlights that all of us have different types of greatness at our core! The lovely thing is that I can see your Strengths shining through from your posts so far also! So, just while we wait and see if anyone else would like to join us on this part of the journey, can I suggest that you take some time to mull these over and see if there's any ways in which you already express these strengths while you're with your horses?
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Post by wendyihts on Jun 30, 2008 15:33:45 GMT 1
Thought I'd share my Signature Strengths with you all too. Top Strength Curiosity and interest in the world You are curious about everything. You are always asking questions, and you find all subjects and topics fascinating. You like exploration and discovery. Second Strength Love of learning You love learning new things, whether in a class or on your own. You have always loved school, reading, and museums-anywhere and everywhere there is an opportunity to learn. Third Strength Creativity, ingenuity, and originality Thinking of new ways to do things is a crucial part of who you are. You are never content with doing something the conventional way if a better way is possible. Fourth Strength Capacity to love and be loved You value close relations with others, in particular those in which sharing and caring are reciprocated. The people to whom you feel most close are the same people who feel most close to you. Fifth Strength Zest, enthusiasm, and energy Regardless of what you do, you approach it with excitement and energy. You never do anything halfway or halfheartedly. For you, life is an adventure. Yup, I recognise all the above LOL
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bumper
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Post by bumper on Jun 30, 2008 15:34:57 GMT 1
I have also done the test, but, like wendymp, I am unsure what to do with my strengths!
Your Top Strength Capacity to love and be loved You value close relations with others, in particular those in which sharing and caring are reciprocated. The people to whom you feel most close are the same people who feel most close to you. Your Second Strength Curiosity and interest in the world You are curious about everything. You are always asking questions, and you find all subjects and topics fascinating. You like exploration and discovery. Your Third Strength Love of learning You love learning new things, whether in a class or on your own. You have always loved school, reading, and museums-anywhere and everywhere there is an opportunity to learn. Your Fourth Strength Kindness and generosity You are kind and generous to others, and you are never too busy to do a favor. You enjoy doing good deeds for others, even if you do not know them well. Your Fifth Strength Creativity, ingenuity, and originality Thinking of new ways to do things is a crucial part of who you are. You are never content with doing something the conventional way if a better way is possible.
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Post by wendymp on Jun 30, 2008 16:09:25 GMT 1
Well - looking at the top 5 confirms that the last thing I should be doing is aspiring to do things the way they are done in the "estabished" horsey world - those values are completely contrary to the bashit-and-see crowd. It is not for me and I have to accept that - and so do they. This is great, so now if people ask me why I don't go hunting or thrashing round the countryside or eventing I can quite honestly say it's not my thing - and not feel bad afterwards (I always felt inadequate after saying that). BUT what is me is schooling nicely at home, going for quiet little hacks and clicker training. I knew that - but I couldn't really accept it before. Then to push the bubble when we are ready some local dressage (I know the place, very civilized, 10 minute drive away) and I quite fancy equitation jumping but not sure if I'll find any, maybe a clinic at Arrow Equestrian. Ha! I feel a plan coming on! (can I stop feeling bad now? )
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Post by luckyrider on Jun 30, 2008 16:28:03 GMT 1
Couldn't have a better plan, wendymp!
Oh boy, I was not sure about taking the test. The same questions put many times in different ways, I became self-conscious and too aware of all the inconsistencies in my answers...
then got this:
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First Strength Gratitude You are aware of the good things that happen to you, and you never take them for granted. Your friends and family members know that you are a grateful person because you always take the time to express your thanks. Second Strength Citizenship, teamwork, and loyalty You excel as a member of a group. You are a loyal and dedicated teammate, you always do your share, and you work hard for the success of your group. Your Third Strength Kindness and generosity You are kind and generous to others, and you are never too busy to do a favor. You enjoy doing good deeds for others, even if you do not know them well. Your Fourth Strength Love of learning You love learning new things, whether in a class or on your own. You have always loved school, reading, and museums-(my italics -- see below) anywhere and everywhere there is an opportunity to learn. Your Fifth Strength Capacity to love and be loved You value close relations with others, in particular those in which sharing and caring are reciprocated. The people to whom you feel most close are the same people who feel most close to you. -------------------------------------------------------------------------
Funny thing is I remember answering "neutral" in particular to the museums question -- it seems I love them more than I thought! Of course certain museums are fabulous and I will go again and again, but I have also been to too many tin-pot places with no more than a few dusty paintings on offer!
But, to get back to the topic, I have to think about how to utilise my strengths, if I believe them.
This is a fantastic exercise but very difficult! Reminds me of the book What Colour is your Parachute.
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Post by gilly on Jun 30, 2008 18:23:17 GMT 1
I've had a really busy few days so have got completely left behind now so am backing out. Am going to enjoy reading everyone else's bits though, and am sure I'll learn plenty from all of you. Thanks Wendy for offering this fantastic opportunity to everyone xx
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milo
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Post by milo on Jun 30, 2008 22:20:38 GMT 1
my top strength is kindness and generosity, followed by bravery and valour, then third is capacity to love and be loved,cant remember the rest but i was surprised at the results.
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Post by rosisotherhalf on Jun 30, 2008 22:38:17 GMT 1
Crikey Wendy, i thought you were going to leave us alone for a few days to see how we got on....... next thing i know i've logged on to find two pages of posts to read
So to one and all.......sorry this is out of sync with the way the thread has gone.
Right, i've bought my body protector, i spoke to "rosi" (it wasn;t overly nice) about how i wanted to approach riding and tonight i "Chose" to ride for the first time since this thread started.
I made the decision 5 minutes before we left the house, we got to the yard and i decided it would take as long as it took to get on board, had a chat with one of the other owners at the yard, and had to wait because my sister phoned "rosi" just at the point of tacking up where i used to get nervous so i went and had a good giggle with the YO.
Nicest ride ever! Went on an often ridden route for about 45 mins and felt fantastic - i was not going to let "kenny everett" even open his mouth and he didn't!. I led, I followed, i overtook, i made my boy wait
The horse was throwing his head a bit (fly bother) and that was fine - a year ago i'd have been worried about being launched over the front, he semi-tried a couple of paces of canter on the way home and the funny thing was, i was so enjoying it (RELAXED) that i was able to say to "rosi" that when he had his canterette I "felt" for the first time what i always knew i did " and gripped on" with my legs - more importantly i didn't panic about it, released my legs and asked him to slow down which he did perfectly!
I think "kenny" is sulking good and proper right now!
time for me to do some catching up on this thread
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bumper
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Having one child makes you a parent; having two you are a referee
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Post by bumper on Jul 1, 2008 0:09:26 GMT 1
I miss my zest! Why is it at number 21!
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em&ed
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Post by em&ed on Jul 1, 2008 8:03:36 GMT 1
Your Top Strength Appreciation of beauty and excellence You notice and appreciate beauty, excellence, and/or skilled performance in all domains of life, from nature to art to mathematics to science to everyday experience. Your Second Strength Humor and playfulness You like to laugh and tease. Bringing smiles to other people is important to you. You try to see the light side of all situations. Your Third Strength Kindness and generosity You are kind and generous to others, and you are never too busy to do a favor. You enjoy doing good deeds for others, even if you do not know them well. Your Fourth Strength Capacity to love and be loved You value close relations with others, in particular those in which sharing and caring are reciprocated. The people to whom you feel most close are the same people who feel most close to you. Your Fifth Strength Bravery and valor You are a courageous person who does not shrink from threat, challenge, difficulty, or pain. You speak up for what is right even if there is opposition. You act on your convictions. WOW!! I'm brave!! ;D This is really very interesting - thank you wendy
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Post by wendyihts on Jul 1, 2008 12:15:14 GMT 1
OK, just to clarify some stuff before getting on to what I want to say next about the Strengths exercise. Basically, although the Strengths Survey is really good and well-designed, it should never be believed over and above what you already have experienced in your life. ie Life comes 1st, survey opinion comes 2nd everytime. But the Strengths Survey is useful in highlighting things that you probably already know about yourself but hadn't realised were strengths you could put to even better use. So, it's more about showing you 'oh that's why....' - it's a starting point for an exploration. It's not the end point. The Strengths Survey basically says that looking around the world, there appears to be 24 Strengths that seem to work for people from all kinds of cultures and help them live positive, constructive and happy lives. The Strengths Survey then asks you all those questions and on that basis it puts the 24 Strengths in rank order for you. Usually, people can see themselves in their top Strengths and see themselves less in the Strengths lower down the list, but not always. Sometimes we really don't relate to some of the top listed Strengths and sometimes we really relate to some of the Strengths listed lower down. I do think it's interesting to reflect on the differences though and just ask yourself 'why might that be?' for example, where zest, enthusiasm etc have come way down the list and yet it's something you relate to, is it just because life has somehow taken you off track? Do you want to develop that Strength further? Do you want to reconnect with it? If so, think about ways in which you can start to build it back in, perhaps by looking at how you used to use that strength or look at how people who use it and see if you can 'take a leaf from their book'. Em&ed - Yes! I can see your Bravery shining through from your participation in the Perfect Confidence group! ROH - sorry! I meant 'the weekend' when I said 'a few days' Note to self: be more specific! ;D But it sounds like you had a fantastic few days anyhow. And does Kenny hitch up his boobs when he sulks? OK, off to do everyone's lunches (mine and the horses) and then will be back to post a bit more about using your Strengths to Build Your Confidence.
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Post by wendymp on Jul 1, 2008 13:23:35 GMT 1
Ah that makes sense. That's why spirituality and leadership are my bottom 2 - perfect sense! ;D
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Post by wendyihts on Jul 1, 2008 16:19:27 GMT 1
Making Your Strengths Work for YouI think that using your strengths to help you move forward in life is one of those areas that's been a bit neglected, especially when it comes to developing more confidence around horses. A lot of the time we do end up focusing on what is wrong and then fixing it. But how about focusing more on what is right and then doing more of it? There's a growing body of research out there that shows this is an even more powerful way of living our lives and, even though it can be used to deal with Grand Life Issues, there's no reason why it can't work on more focused and specialised areas such as 'confident horsemanship'. As I was scooting around the net for good resources about using your strengths, I found this article on the following website evenstaronline.com/articles/strengths.html and there were some specific things this lady said that I wanted to quote to you. I agree with what she says about how using your Strengths can affect your whole way of approaching life, and of course that's a much bigger thing than dealing with the original Cracker we started off with. One thing I would say is that, while I think it's great and makes complete sense that you can use your Strengths to help you solve your cracker, it's not necessarily a quick fix process. Certainly, having recently reviewed my own Strengths, what I'm finding is that they keep rattling around at the back of my head and every so often, I'm in the middle of doing something and I just think 'Ah - perhaps that's what it means to e.g. 'Love and be Loved'' or 'hmmm, I think I'm not enjoying this because I just can't use my originality and creativity on it..'. It seems to be one of those processes that can tick on a bit - but I suggest it here because it deals with what brings out the best in each of us individually. It's also important, I think, to suggest that by focusing more on what's great about you, and your horse, and your situation, you may very well find out that other 'problems' fade away or become very much more manageable. However, back to the Cracker. What I think would be useful would be for you to think about your Strengths in terms of all the sideways, diagonal and reverse moves you might make when it comes to increasing the size of your comfort bubble. To give you an example, for the first time in my life I went to one of those tree climbing parks on Saturday for my daughter's 11th birthday along with my OH, our son (who's nearly 8), my daugher and one of her school friends. It's one of those parks where you are given proper climbing gear and you have to attach yourself to safety ropes etc. Well, at some point round that park I just decided to push my own Bubble and finish all 7 courses. The last 2 courses were and they were darned hard, physical graft to boot. I found chucking myself off platforms 40ft or 50ft in the air attached only to a pulley on a slide a bit of an emotional challenge - but not so much that I was petrified (no splat!). And I was the only one to blinking well finish that 7th course, even though I'd had to dig really deep to get the guts to see it through. But at the end I thought to myself 'blimey, you had more inside you than you really thought you had' - and the good feeling is still with me days later. Perhaps it will never leave. For me, that was a real example of a sideways or diagonal move, where I pushed myself to extend my comfort bubble and realised I actually had more inside me than I realised. What's the strength I used? My love of learning... every obstacle I thought to myself 'OK, now I'm going to figure out how to get round this' and then at the end I thought 'so what did I learn about myself'. But for someone else, with different strengths, they might have used it as an opportunity to ... be more creative, to show their bravery, to work as a team..... whatever the strength, each time you use it, whether it's with your horses or not, you're putting 'confidence credits' in your emotional account that you can draw on when you get to dealing with your Cracker situations with your horses. The thought occurred to me that, just maybe, our Angels talk to us in terms of our Strengths and that the more we tune into our Strengths, the more we're turning up the volume on our Angel (and driving our Devil out). Because really, our Angel isn't something seperate to us, it IS us in our best forms.
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Post by wendyihts on Jul 1, 2008 16:24:15 GMT 1
OK guys, looking at what we've covered what I am going to do is, for the rest of this week I will cover two more subjects - Beliefs and Support Network - and then I will officially 'end' my formal part of The Experiment. Just a heads up to say that's what we're going to cover next and that my formal contributions on here will end on Friday this week. (though I'm always going to be kicking about on the DG.. )
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Post by loullou on Jul 1, 2008 20:25:50 GMT 1
,mm intersesting but i am struggling to apply this a little. top strength for me is curiosity and interest in the world....need to think how that helps me with my cracker....
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