For all those with Hacking Issues

[kpick]

I feel so sorry for you, i really do. I used to also have serious hacking issues when my old pony used to get me off, without fail, usually infront of a car or lorry.
This problem then kept on going when i got Inky, now 7 years ago, and i didnt hack him out for a year. Hes the most sane horse to hack out in the world ever, and i just didnt dare.
First time i took him out, he went a little bit wild, nothing overly serious, just messed around, it TERRIFIED me, i said never again.
I did the one thing im probably most thankful for myself for deciding, and giving him another chance. He turned my confidence round, and it felt great.

Sounds strange, but until I managed to hack him out safely, without the tension, and the panic, I didnt progress in my riding one bit, the behaviour rubbed off on me whilst schooling. I then started the 'I dont think i can do that', and once i had a mind set, that, was that.

So basically, Ive managed, with the help of a very special pony indeed (even though know he knows i dont care at all he messes me around any time possible, lol) to turn my confidence around, just allow one bit of trust, for 10 minutes, and it changed my life.
I hope and pray that others can do that too, and by reading this, know that people like me who is now very confident (not trying to be cocky, but yeah) that we all have our downfalls, its not just you, your not stupid, your not an idiot, and it can work out, so keep on going, fight the demons, and come out a better person for doing it the correct way!
XXX

[kya]

Kpick, I like what you said about trusting for 10 minutes and well done. I have to force myself to let my horse do what he's going to do sometimes, to let it happen, rather than judging him as about to bolt/buck/nap. I mean if I don't give him the chance to do right, how can we go forward. Inspring story.

[amarche]

thank you kpick for you story

the parelli system talk of a 'passenger ride' where you hand the control over to your horse for a while (obviously in a safe controlled environment) so that they take you for a wander and you just sit and enjoy the experience. very similar to your 'trust for10 minutes'

I did this with my pony (who is an excellent confidence giver) who took me to the nearest blade of grass one day I might progress to the tb......

[cesca]

Kpick you are one wise chick and an asset to this corner of the site. Your post totally strikes a chord with me because it's what I believe too. I used to be nervous hacking, 5 years ago when I first had my boy - but with good reason, he was a bolter and regularly took off with me down busy roads, through housing estates, even once down a near sheer drop on common land...BUT I kept going and when he got better, my confidence had to catch up with him.

Some things that people told me, that I will share here: Firstly, when we went to our first rally (ok not hacking but a massive deal to us, big open field, first time in a show type situation, rising 6) I was bricking myself the night before and my ex-boyfriend, who was a jockey and fearless, said to me "if he is terrible, which he may well be, don't worry and I will take him for you next time. But remember, he has the best chance of success with you - you know the horse, noone else does" - and I thought, yes, I do. And I suddenly felt capable of taking him. And he was wonderful, never put a foot wrong.

The other one I remember, is after the rally when everyone at the yard was gobsmacked at how beautifully behaved he'd been, and the progress I'd made (some were pleased, some were peeved that the horse they'd condemned had come good), was one older lady on the yard. She hadn't been there but she saw me smiling from ear to ear and gathered it went well. She didn't seem surprised at all, and I asked why - and she said "because you have an excellent relationship with him". Which was, and is true.

Nowadays we'll hack anywhere, do fun rides, and yes he needs riding but he's great, the horse I always dreamed of. We've come so far but we've only done it because each time we've done something new and challenging, I've put my trust in him. And in five years not once, ever, has he let me down.

Give yourselves and your horses some credit and tell yourselves you can. So many people on my yard (who have only known us since we've been sane) say to me oh I wish I had a horse like yours, I can't do hacks/fun rides/shows/whatever because my horse will run off/spook/buck/misbehave/kill me. It's such a shame they have no faith in their horses, and their relationships with their horses, and won't even try. I never say "ooh he used to be a nutcase", I just allow them to think I got lucky with a wonderfully sensible horse (they also probably believe I paid a fortune for him - I didn't!).

We on here are the real brave ones because we keep trying to get to our goals! So many give up. Our horses do trust us and do want to do well for us, and if we let them, they will.

[kpick]

Good on you, Cesea! Thats what i put this thread up for. To show people it can be done with a little help and a little perswation. Its great to know just how well your coming along with your boy, he obviously trusts you so very much!

And i certainly second that we are the brave ones, we're sitting, admitting we have little blips in our confidence, and trying to help each other work though them, and i believe this is the pinacle of this DG, because everyone helps everyone else, weather its against their morals or not, they will always help.

Saying that, i have a friend who was an excellent, and i mean, amazing, pony rider. She thought she'd be able to handle a horse that needed work, but she couldnt, but would NEVER admit to being scared, or nervous, maybe thinking i would point and laugh..? Fact is, if she had done so, i could have helped her in so many ways, and its such a shame she was too... untrusting in me to tell me her problems. By confronting the fact theres a problem, you have taken the biggest step, the next part is the easy bit.

[angblue]

Wow kpick & cesca what truly inspiring threads ;D
I'm going for a hack in the morning & I WILL be trusting Blue to look after me instead of panicking about the "what ifs" !!
Thanks guys xx

[em&ed]

I DO have issues with hacking - I feel much safer in a school environment, so Thanks for putting up your stories - they are an inspiration - at the moment I am nowhere near confident enough to take my horse out alone - would contemplate it with another horse and rider in right conditions ie. good weather/ if he's calm.... you know the list. One of my horse's 'things' is to tank off whilst being led, but i have been doing groundwork with him and this has lessened, he's not done it for about 8 weeks now until the other day and it was a genuine spook at something on the yard; snorted, eyes on stalks, mini rear spin and run... he was slipping on the concrete so I let him go. but a friend told me the other night - if he does that while being led, he will more than likely do it while you are riding - so my confidence went down a few notches. The thing is my horse is not very confident either, so I am not sure I could hand over control for 10 mins - maybe in the school - but i think he'd just wander to the door and stand looking out

[Casper]

Managed a great solo hack on Bobby today. Nothing earth shattering, but meant the world to me. Just pottering along with my lovely horse, enjoying the countryside and the gorgeous weather. We've got an awful long way to go, but today was a great start.

And all thanks to my lovely "Confidence Coach" Louise C and all of you Confidence Crew Gang! x

[kpick]

Well done Casper, what a huge acheivement for you! And, saying its not earth shattering, maybe not to people who dont understand these kinds of confidence flumps, but for people like us, who have been there, or are in the same boat as yourself, and more highly, your self, its a huge thing, and it is earth shattering!

[madmare1]

this is like me and jumping....taken me 5 years to get back to where I feel confident enought to jump..and to kick Crystal on into a jump....as she would rather stop than knock it down/hurt herself.

I'm glad none of you saw me today coming back from a hack...Crystal has got major Spring fever....and I haven't had a step of walk for the hour I was out....just jog, jog, jog,all the way. the slightest little thing it was 'OH MY GOD.....that scary little sparrow is going to peck my hooves off!!!!' and hop to the other side of the lane, wih her tail over her back, and her eyes out on stalks!!!!!

Yet...I love hacking out....just you and your horse watching the world race by, while you enjoy a slower pace of life. carry on....hacking is fun, for both horse and rider!

[giftgirl]

that is really inspiring, kpick
i am nervous in traffic, always thinking what if a tractor comes round the corner now? and others like that.
i am starting to realise that i can handle what gift does, and it is never really, really dangerous!
so hopefully, i will improve quite soon
a real inspiration, kpick
giftgirl xx

[em&ed]

Interesting giftgirl, as my Riding Instructor said if you realise that you can handle what they throw at you, your confidence will grow....

[Casper]

kpick said:

Well done Casper, what a huge acheivement for you! And, saying its not earth shattering, maybe not to people who dont understand these kinds of confidence flumps, but for people like us, who have been there, or are in the same boat as yourself, and more highly, your self, its a huge thing, and it is earth shattering!

Thanks for your lovely post kpick, I really appreciate it - means a lot xx

[cesca]

But that's the thing Casper - these things ARE earth shattering! They are massive achievements and you should be very proud. We are of you anyway!

Kpick very good point about people who feel that admitting any apprehension is just not an option. I know of two on my yard - one (who also a matter of fact shattered my confidence even further a while back when she got on my boy to jump him, failed and pronounced him impossible) who has a new, young horse with issues and keeps trying to persuade another girl on the yard to ride it for her; and another, who has an eventer that keeps stopping XC. She said something about "knowing she's going to stop" and I said something like "so she does" and she bit my head off saying "well she does stop, so what am I supposed to do?" - I don't take it personally because nerves will make you very short tempered and defensive...if you don't admit to them and work on them. But this lady is quite clearly terrified when it comes to XC. I can relate to that (God I'll say!) but she won't admit it and has to blame the horse. You don't get anywhere until you stop trying to keep up appearances, start not caring what others think, and have the guts to say "I'm scared" so you can start to work on it.

[madmare1]

cesca..take a look at my thread.."jumping for the first time in 5 years" and read what happened to me. Crystal would rather stop than hit a fence and sometimes, if I have go the approach wrong, yes, she stops....but I have had to say,"I'm scared" and I've been called coward and everything else.....but now, we are jumping again....and enjoying it!