confidence failing, fliaing and falling

[Suz]

So me and my boy have a napping issue and we have spent the past few months having everything checked and fixed. the last 3 weeks have been spent walking out in hand and our relationship has blossomed he now trots across the field to be caught so today when the saddler came to deliver and fit our new saddle I waas full of (false) hope that we would go out for a little ride and it would all work fantastically.
weeelll it didn't.
so we got through the first few napping wobbles fine and had made it almost 1/3rd of a mile up the road when he threw his 4th so I started the normal procedure of turning circles and he reared!
he has never done this before and as soon as he was standing still i got off feeling very shaken. We carried on walking another 200 yrds up the road while i phoned my friend Zoe for some advice. So after a pep chat and many deep breaths I got back on to ride home and he was good as gold. Got back ino the house and burst into tears for quite a while.
Was so excited at trying to work towards our first discover endurance ride but its on the 5th May and there is no way we will be ready. I am feeling anxious just about getting back on tomorrow to try again.
Thanks for listening just had to get it off my chest.

[kya]

Hi Suz, perhaps the discover endurance ride is simply too soon for you and your horse. My OH is always saying to me to not have expectations, and when I released my expectations of my horse, I certainly had a far better time. He had a fearful moment on his first ride out in what sounds like weeks of work in hand. The rear must have been scary I know, but you did ride out, turn around and ride home... I think that's great. I'm sure the others will have things to contribute, but don't be too hard on yourself or your horse. More time I'd say, company on the hacks and perhaps some instruction? We all know exactly what you're going through, believe me.

[rhillahorse]

Sorry you've had a bad day suz. Remember, you rode home and he was fine. Tomorrow's another day. (((hugs))) x

[chitori]

It could have been anything Suz, he might actually really have seen something *terrifying* whilst turning circles, spring sunshine might have gotten him over excited, or just jitters and not-used-ness to being ridden, could even have been the new saddle poked him somewhere momentarily and made him jump.
I think getting off and walking him probably helped you and him because he thought, hey, I reared...yet still I am out with my saddle on and getting back on is even better:)
I'd say you made progress He reared, you dealt with it and got back on! Next challenge!
Good luck
Hannah x

[Casper]

First of all Suz well done for riding through three napping episodes, waiting until he stood still before getting off, carrying on walking a little way and THEN getting back on to ride home. You are far braver than me - that is really really good that you could do that.

How about if you can't hack out with another horse at the moment taking somebody on foot with you? Bobby is a spook monster at times on his own when ridden, but if somebody is on foot he is usually a complete star. And I am not too proud to admit that when I first got him my hubby would literally have us on a lead rein going up the road!!!

Good luck for tomorrow, I am sure everything will be fine. And don't forget to breathe. If you inhale through your nose to say the count of 4, exhale through your mouth using the same counting rhythmn (SP) for at least a count of 6 but ideally 8. The difference in you and your horse will be amazing! You almost feel your neddie go "phew, things really are okay, mum is really really relaxed" and usually they come right down.

[nic1]

I agree with chitori you did fab. I know it is scary and i am the worst nervous nelly at times. so i say you did really well. You carried on, you kept it together for him and then rode home.
Try not to dwell on it and maybe don't focus on the ride just yet, because if you are not achieving what you want it can sometimes make it feel worse, concentrate and work on the small things and celebrate those and before you know it you will be ready. Take the pressure away.

Nic
x

[giftgirl]

maybe he was just having a bad day and with the new saddle and the hack, he went over.
i am sure it will be better tomoro!
good luck
giftgirlxx

[wozzer]

Blimey - but you managed the situation and dealt with it, so a huge well done ;D

Great advice from Caspar, Kanga and all the others - as always.

When you ride tomorrow, if you feel nervous about this, perhaps you could just promise yourself to tack up and get on and just ride around the yard? Don't force yourself to go out on your own if you are feeling worried, but agree with yourself that you will do something, even if that is just to get on for 5 mins. It is so much better for your confidence if you get on again tomorrow - trust me on this one, hun. And I very much endorse the suggestion to get someone on foot to come out with you plus remembering to breathe.

We're all behind you - keep on going chick - let us know how you get on ! xx

[laura]

echo all the above and especally wozzer ...... take little steps ... better a good five mins than taking even one step too far .

I have been through this sorta stuff with taz for a loong time and the number of times I ..... its a series of TINY steps till you can get a horse to the satage of relaxed hacks out ..... even now Taz still has the occasional day ( usually when in season) when she takes an extra look at things !!!!! Maybe the new saddle PLUS the hack a tiny step too much.

echo having somone else with you for safety .... plus also a bit of a help to remind you to BREATHE ;D ....... personally I sing

[Suz]

Thank you so much every one Feeling much better know and have a plan for tomorrow. We are going on a tiny (like 15 min) ride with my Mum leading one of her minis and a friend on hand with a lear rein if needs be - I am not proud lead reins are fantastic. Depending on how brave i feel i may even walk the first half of the ride and then ride home (every one knows the tigers don't attack on the way home right?!)
Will keep you updated
x

[wozzer]

Good for you, having a plan!. Let us know how you get on. Good luck. xx

[Casper]

Yay, that sounds great Suz. Have a great time, and don't forget to tell us all how well you got on x

[chitori]

I hope you have a wonderful ride x

[Suz]

We did it. Went for a tiny 1/2 mile hack with Mum mini shetland and friend in tow. Walked the first half and then rode home and he was seriously good. He got a bit impatient when mum tried to persuade her mini thing into the stream but i showed them how it was done and we forded the stream for the first time ever - he definitly isnt afraid of water any more
Thanks again for all your kind words of encouragement they have seriously helped.
Next step a 2 mile walk and ride tomorrow!

[Casper]

Woohay Suz, fantastic news!