Post by ktk on Mar 26, 2007 21:35:42 GMT 1
Hi, ive not been on here for quite a while now- moved house so no internet connection, but I could do with some help/advice if you have the time to read through this post.
I'll start at the beginning and I apologise as it will prob be a bit of a mission!
I have three horses, Copper (30yo arab), Bailey (16.1h 8yo) and Ebony (15.1 10yo).
In June I had a nasty fall from Bailey than ended with me in ITC. Short version: I had set some jumps out, not intending to ride, so they were set out for Copper. I eventually decided to ride Bailey and forgot to change the striding between the double. Turned Bailey to it, over the first he went, stopped at the second (understandable!). I lost my balance and sat down hard, he bolted. I came off, fell down onto the path that ran down the side of the field (I found the nice hard concrete part!). If I landed on my arse it would have hurt, but I somehow managed to land on my head. The only reason I didnt break my neck was that I had only been out the osteopath a few hours so my spine just cracked out of place all the way down instead, I did split my head open which scared the life out of my poor friend who called the ambulance for me!
I cant remember anything from approaching the fence to a week later.
I was back riding after maybe 2-3 weeks. On copper to start with, rode and jumped him in the same field I came off in. I slowly progressed to riding Ebony, and then back to Bailey again. Nothing seemed to bother me too much. I just wouldnt ride Bailey without someone near me.
As horses go Bailey is lovely, an absolute sweetheart.
My confidence is now totally shot, but its weird. Once im riding im ok, im happy to jump (well me and Bailey walk up to the small cross country jumps and he climbs over them for me!), but im happy to charge about jumping everything on Ebony. We go galloping on hte beach (our yard leads directly onto a nature reserve and most perfect riding beach). But the thought of going up to the yard makes me feel sick, even considering organising going for a ride is unheard of, I have panic attacks, I will sit and shake when it comes to tacking up, cant cope with anything happening that ive not planned when out hacking (dogs, people, bikes etc). I loose my temper so easily now, have no patience for people (in general and with the horses).
My doctor has prescibed me prozak and a beta blocker. Im happy with the beta blockers but wont take the prozak. Thats about as far as it goes.
How does everyone else combat their nerves, anything you can do to snap you out of it?
All I can say is that good things can come from even the worst of situations. If I didnt fall of Bail, I wouldnt have met my OH and wouldnt be marrying him in October. I have so much patience for my horses now (shame I dont have so much for people!). Ok, so I cant get a job, my memory is probably permanetly broken, balance is still not right, eyesight still isnt fixed.. but I have three lovely fit and well horses and a perfect fiance.
Why cant I snap out of it and just get on with it??? Anything anyone can offer or suggest would be much appreciated.
Thanks x
I'll start at the beginning and I apologise as it will prob be a bit of a mission!
I have three horses, Copper (30yo arab), Bailey (16.1h 8yo) and Ebony (15.1 10yo).
In June I had a nasty fall from Bailey than ended with me in ITC. Short version: I had set some jumps out, not intending to ride, so they were set out for Copper. I eventually decided to ride Bailey and forgot to change the striding between the double. Turned Bailey to it, over the first he went, stopped at the second (understandable!). I lost my balance and sat down hard, he bolted. I came off, fell down onto the path that ran down the side of the field (I found the nice hard concrete part!). If I landed on my arse it would have hurt, but I somehow managed to land on my head. The only reason I didnt break my neck was that I had only been out the osteopath a few hours so my spine just cracked out of place all the way down instead, I did split my head open which scared the life out of my poor friend who called the ambulance for me!
I cant remember anything from approaching the fence to a week later.
I was back riding after maybe 2-3 weeks. On copper to start with, rode and jumped him in the same field I came off in. I slowly progressed to riding Ebony, and then back to Bailey again. Nothing seemed to bother me too much. I just wouldnt ride Bailey without someone near me.
As horses go Bailey is lovely, an absolute sweetheart.
My confidence is now totally shot, but its weird. Once im riding im ok, im happy to jump (well me and Bailey walk up to the small cross country jumps and he climbs over them for me!), but im happy to charge about jumping everything on Ebony. We go galloping on hte beach (our yard leads directly onto a nature reserve and most perfect riding beach). But the thought of going up to the yard makes me feel sick, even considering organising going for a ride is unheard of, I have panic attacks, I will sit and shake when it comes to tacking up, cant cope with anything happening that ive not planned when out hacking (dogs, people, bikes etc). I loose my temper so easily now, have no patience for people (in general and with the horses).
My doctor has prescibed me prozak and a beta blocker. Im happy with the beta blockers but wont take the prozak. Thats about as far as it goes.
How does everyone else combat their nerves, anything you can do to snap you out of it?
All I can say is that good things can come from even the worst of situations. If I didnt fall of Bail, I wouldnt have met my OH and wouldnt be marrying him in October. I have so much patience for my horses now (shame I dont have so much for people!). Ok, so I cant get a job, my memory is probably permanetly broken, balance is still not right, eyesight still isnt fixed.. but I have three lovely fit and well horses and a perfect fiance.
Why cant I snap out of it and just get on with it??? Anything anyone can offer or suggest would be much appreciated.
Thanks x
