margom
Novice Poster
Posts: 17
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Post by margom on Jan 4, 2014 20:30:27 GMT 1
Happy new year The Year of the Horse! My mare, there's not a thing wrong with her. She's just figured out I'm not much of a leader! She shakes her head when I ask to trot, or worse in canter. It's just initially when she strikes off. It frightens me, then she stops! I'm not giving her enough rein on strike-off, not insisting she do it. I m afraid to do stuff on my own. I get lessons and I'll try in lessons to be assertive and it works it's just when I'm on my own. I think I'll be ending up giving her to my son who rides her now in a lesson as we'll. I'm jealous rotten mother! He doesn't have confidence issues, he had but now there gone he's 16. I can hardly afford livery let alone anything more . I said I was going to be more positive! If I'm ruining her I should just join the rest of the mothers rail side! I'm sorry ! Maybe it's temporary what can anyone say to that pile if cra..
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Post by happysnail on Jan 4, 2014 20:53:42 GMT 1
Hugs margom. Traditional horsemanship I found doesn't really teach you the psychology or skills of leadership for horses. Don't beat yourself up. You're miles ahead by starting look at where problems are coming from and I think you'll be surprised at the difference the practical skills make in bridging the gap. And just think, investing in IH help or training is investigating in every horse you interact with. Have a wee look at Kelly's books if you haven't already - they're really clear to understand and there are practical exercises all the way.
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margom
Novice Poster
Posts: 17
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Post by margom on Jan 4, 2014 23:55:16 GMT 1
I have KM's Perfect Confidence I should get Perfect Manners as we'll. Must re read the confidence one first! I watched a video of myself today! Shoulders forward, toes out and bouncing like saddle was a trampoline! My daughter is like "why don't you just sit there ?" Ahh. But thanx funny bunny (is it soz that's no it ) I was panicking :-)
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margom
Novice Poster
Posts: 17
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Post by margom on Jan 4, 2014 23:57:41 GMT 1
Sorry happysnail my mind works weirdly funny bunny? Dunno !!
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margom
Novice Poster
Posts: 17
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Post by margom on Jan 4, 2014 23:58:08 GMT 1
Sorry happysnail my mind works weirdly funny bunny? Dunno !!
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margom
Novice Poster
Posts: 17
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Post by margom on Jan 4, 2014 23:58:46 GMT 1
Sorry happysnail my mind works weirdly funny bunny? Dunno !!
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Post by happysnail on Jan 5, 2014 0:03:07 GMT 1
Perfect Manners is really helpful . I'm kicking myself when I'm saying its a journey (sounds like a cliche) but it really is and you might even find you enjoy the trip . Is there anyone in your area who could offer a bit of moral support?
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margom
Novice Poster
Posts: 17
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Post by margom on Jan 5, 2014 23:14:03 GMT 1
Everyone is doing all they can, livery people, hubby and family, I just have to match them in effort! My fear will have to be conquered one baby step at a time! Back to basics as many times as is necessary. I will try and save for a KM course. PG my courage wins
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Post by ruthp on Jan 6, 2014 22:24:58 GMT 1
It sounds to me as if you're expecting a bit too much of yourself. You started this thread with baby steps, and then beat yourself up because your confidence dipped again when you fell off.
Go back to the baby steps. Do more groundwork. Learn some walk and trot dressage tests. Do some pole work. Don't try and keep up with other people, go at your own pace.
I'm not in the slightest bit interested in doing dressage, but I had a couple of lessons and learnt some simple tests which gives me something to work on when I go in the school by myself. Trying to remember the test and practice it seems to occupy the bit of my mind that is otherwise squeaking at me about lack of confidence, so I find that I've done half an hours work without worrying.
Remember those baby steps, and stop trying to run before you can stay on your feet in walk!
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Post by portiabuzz on Jan 7, 2014 17:33:50 GMT 1
sending echo Ruths post put better then i can xx
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