New Livery Stable Wanted

[BJMM]

Hi all, I posted a few days ago after a problem with the so-called friend I sublet my stable/field from. To cut a very long moan short,
she sent me a series of unpleasant texts accusing me of nicking hay to overfeed my horse(who is on a restricted diet because she's a bit of a lard*rse!!) and not pulling my weight re the taking turns turning out/bringing in and feeding(this is despite head girl on adjoining BHS yard telling her that she was taking merciless advantage of my good nature,because I was always being seen
to be doing her two horses every evening through the winter, not that I minded, as far as I'm concerned the job needed doing,I was there so I did it!!)
Anyway,this occured last Weds, now Sunday and said friend has been up three times since then, all three at 4.45-5pm, all three after all yard work has been done by.......guess who? I have come to the conclusion that this arrangement is no longer tenable
for Blaze and myself. I think that the problem stems from the fact that I loaned Blaze for 3 months from this woman before buying her last October, and during the loan period I was helping with her horses as part of the arrangement(I also contributed a cash sum) and I think she regards me as an unpaid groom! I thought we were just helping each other out but it has become clear that the help is only coming from me! I just want to come up to the yard and enjoy my horse, not have silly rows over who picks up the most poo!!!
I am now looking for a new stable/field for Blazey. She would like access to turnout 24/7 in summer and in at night in winter and some company would be preferable. I would like a small,FRIENDLY
yard(!!!) somewhere to store hay/straw and a place for my storage bin, electricity (esp.lights) and a place to school would be nice. Blaze is 15hh,7yr old cob mare and I am 47yr old female
married with three teenage kids,working part time. I have BHS qualifications and lots of experience,esp. with showjumpers. I am currently paying £28 pw for stable/field and buy my own feed and
bedding. I can also use two sand schools and an indoor school but to be honest I would trade those extras for a happy yard and someone to hack with!I am in Ramsgate,Kent and my present yard is Manston/Woodchurch. If anyone has a vacancy or knows anyone who could help,I would be grateful. Thank you. xx
PS. Anyone got a sharp knife to cut this atmosphere ;D ;D
,

[Casper]

Can't help you re another yard as in a different part of the country. Just wanted to say good luck in finding an alternative. Sounds like you have been put on long enough and your good nature well and truly taken advantage of.

In the meantime, with the lighter nights etc can you just do Blazey and leave them to do their horses and vice versa until you get moved? As long as you pay your rent on time before you go can't see any issues with this.

Oh and try a Stanley Knife, that should cut through it all LOL. Good luck in moving soon.

[fircones]

A friend of my daughters who has recently trained and got lots of horse qualifications told me that livery yards are difficult because so many horsey people are truly wierd!!And bitchy!! I would be fascinated to know if this is a general experience. Bitchy groups of women make me want to run miles.

[Casper]

Fircones, that is about right unfortunately. Don't know what it is about horses that brings this out in so many people. If only every yard was run by nice IH DG'ers the world would be a happier place for horses. It is meant to be fun, but some people specialise in making your life a misery on yards. Luckily I keep my horse at a friend's place, but if she gets any more horses herself then mine will have to go :-( I would prefer to rent a field on my own with a companion pony than go on a livery yard, based on a previous bad experience myself and the horror stories I know of or have read on here.

[eskimo]

Fircones i have to 2nd what Casper has said. I to have some Qualifications BHSPT and i no it sounds horrible but i hate going to teach at livery yards. I myself was on livery yards for 14 years and the atmosphere's at times where terrible all caused by certain groups of women.

Bitchy groups of women make me want to run a mile as well and 7 years ago i was lucky enough to have my horses at home so i only have to put up with it when i teach now. But luckily most of my clients keep there horses at home or in the own fields. I can be picky about who i teach as i would never want to be dragged into those bitchy situations. You see all the no it alls lining themselves up outside the manage fences watching and listening to every thing i say to my clients during there lessons. It really annoys me. So i decided to start letting people come to me if they wanted and they love it and progress much faster than when there there every move is being watched by the head bitch on the livery yard.

Sounds awful of me to say all that doesn't it.

[fircones]

Oh dear. I must say the tone of this msgbrd is generally helpful rather than critical which is refreshing so I hope theres more of you out there! Any tips for avoiding the horse owners from hell!

[lindaandrascal]

Yes fircones it is true! We now rent a yard and grazing on our own because we couldnt stand anymore bi*ching at livery yards, we tried a few but they are all the same. We also got fed up of people borrowing things and not giving them back. Another thing that used toannoy us was people bringing in/turning out our horses without asking, weve often left them in the stables when it wet and gone up early to give them a bit of hay and when we got back they would be in the field soaking wet and muddy and we couldnt ride!

[fircones]

Borrowing other peoples things without asking could get very annoying, as could other people messing about with your horse when you arent there.
The bit that worries me most is a bunch of toxic people with nothing better to do, spending their time criticising you because you might be doing things differently or dont want to go out and compete on an expensive thoroughbred. Or whatever. Or just because you are new and learning!! I have been told that these people do exist! Maybe the best attitude is to think: "get a life" and ignore them. ;D
I wish all good luck to the person seeking a nice livery and really hope they find one.

[kas]

It's not uncommon and it's not just women! A YO friend of mine suffered a bitchy couple for months, but kept very calm and tried her hardest to help them. They gave one month's notice but then tried to leave without telling her. They did leave, owing her money but I think it was worth it to see the back of them. As well as bitchy he was petty - he even took a pin he'd provided out of the tractor trailer! Also failed to return some tack she'd lent him.
Good luck blazesmum.

[greenfairy]

What a pity you're not nearer to us, as the yard I'm on sounds EXACTLY what you're looking for.

Good luck in your search.

[devongirl62]

hi sorry wish I could help as I have space on my yard in Devon (north)

can be seen on www.waffapool.com

hope you find somewhere soon or maybe move down my way and I will be able to help

xx

[BJMM]

Thanks,guys, 4 your support. As of last week when this all kicked off, I am doing my horse and nothing else. Interested to see that 'friend' has now palled up with a nice girl on the main yard who will do anything for anyone. This girl is now to be seen bringing in woman's horses
and generally helping out. How long before she gets cr*pped on, I wonder?

[corina]

I think it is an age thing with bitchy yards my experience has always been that if the yard has children Lots of them it is the kids that fall out and if the yard has adults then it is the women that fall out. Try and find a yard with mostly men on it - they dont seem to fall out as much .
Horse livery is known for trauma because everyone is so intense about the situation because it is very expensive, they are very passionate about it and horses are like children we all think our own are nearly perfect. I have yet to find the perfect yard there is always a compromise but sometimes it is best to stick with what you know and try and accept the down side as just being part of it.

If I had moved yards everytime someone was nasty or bitchy I think I would have covered most of the country by now. Its sad but I now feel it goes with the territory, just try and keep out of it if you can.

[fircones]

It sounds a bit like what goes on in the primary school playground at school pickup when the mums start falling out about whose is the most perfect child and how other mums dont do it properly. Its awful - I used to just scurry in, pick up the kids and run!