beckie
Grand Prix Poster
Sensible dressage horsey - haha!
Posts: 2,697
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Poem
Nov 21, 2006 18:00:37 GMT 1
Post by beckie on Nov 21, 2006 18:00:37 GMT 1
I've written a poem for my friends pony, Jinny, that died of colic recently.
I'm not exactly a poet. but I know loads of you on here are, so i was hoping you could comment on my poem and give me ways to make it better? I don't know what it needs. I'll write it here.
I shall miss you darling I hope you'll miss me too I've gone with the angels On their wings I flew.
I'm at the rainbow bridge I gallop all day Through fields of green No pain comes my way
No pain and no suffering We're all so happy But the combinations missing Thats you and me
For while I am here Though I'm having fun Many times I stop And sigh to the sun
And I think about you The good times and the bad And I think of the troubles And the fun times we've had
I wait for the day When I see you at last When my mouth screams a whinny And I gallop to you fast
You will hug me and hold me For what seems like forever Then we will cross the rainbow bridge Always to be together
But don't rush through your life Waiting for that day The time will come It will not go away
So get on with your life I know you'll have fun And remember, to me You were the one.
Please Comment.
beckie
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mobismum
Advanced Poster
My gorgeous boy!!
Posts: 323
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Poem
Nov 21, 2006 23:17:44 GMT 1
Post by mobismum on Nov 21, 2006 23:17:44 GMT 1
That is absolutely beautiful.. it says everything I'd want my horse to say to me and Im sure alot of greiving people who have recently lost their beloved will find strength and comfort in what you have written... Carry on the good work of supporting your friend in her sad loss.... your a good freind to her...
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beckie
Grand Prix Poster
Sensible dressage horsey - haha!
Posts: 2,697
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Poem
Nov 22, 2006 13:05:52 GMT 1
Post by beckie on Nov 22, 2006 13:05:52 GMT 1
Thanks Mobismum, as I said, I'm no poet, but I felt like writing it, it just came to me. (It actually came to me, not whilst I was walking by a river or something poetic, but actually when I was doing Trigonometry... I had to hide it under my sheet on using Trigonometric ratios to find angles. lol. as i say, it just came)
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Poem
Nov 22, 2006 17:20:48 GMT 1
Post by LisaM on Nov 22, 2006 17:20:48 GMT 1
Really lovely
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wills
Grand Prix Poster
Posts: 4,657
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Poem
Nov 23, 2006 21:20:21 GMT 1
Post by wills on Nov 23, 2006 21:20:21 GMT 1
aww becki that is lovely. xx
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beckie
Grand Prix Poster
Sensible dressage horsey - haha!
Posts: 2,697
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Poem
Nov 24, 2006 11:28:38 GMT 1
Post by beckie on Nov 24, 2006 11:28:38 GMT 1
thanks wills, I hope Ellen thinks so too.
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