Help i don't feel like me and my horse are friends

[outoftheblue]

Scratch his withers and see what he thinks about that!

[outoftheblue]

I was thinking about your post whilst I was fetching my horses in. EAch one of them (there are 7) has a different personality and each one wants a slightly different interaction with us. However, I think they are bonded with me because they know where they stand with me. There is no hitting, no shouting no bullying into this position just insistence on what you want from them and loads of patience in the beginning. Thye then know what to expect from you. I watched someone yesterday endlessly fuss with their horses head - and then get bitten. My horses need to know I will never tease or torment them or do something unexpected like sudenly shouting at them (not that I am saying you do but you may unconsiously do other things that annoy him) and they in return treat me with the same respect. When Bluey is being schooled he wickers a bit when he goes past to tell me its difficult but he is giving it his best shot. Wehn Welly goes past me in the ring he does the same and he is saying, dont go and leave me here, its not home. When he stands on three legs in his stable, I know he wants cream on his sheath - he for his part knows he can ask me and will get what he wants. The girls are less demonstrative but are delighted to see us if we have been out for the day, say and someone else has looked after them. I think the bottom line is that they trust us completely and the bond has been built from that. I felt very sorry that you feel you od not have a bond and hope it will come . If all else fails try the post above - its like one horse grooming another!

[nomdeac]

I used to have a little 13hh show pony when I was a child. I longed for her to be affectionate but she never was. However she was a brilliant ride, would jump anything for me, went into streams and generally looked after me as a novice rider. Perhaps your horse just isn't very cuddly but he will make it up to you in so many other ways. I'm not a very cuddly person, so I know how he feels.

[shan]

Helen, you've started with a horse you considered selling, but now love to bits because he's a lovely chilled out boy - that says something to me! I'd agree with what others have said here, some horses just don't show their feelings and can be quite stand-offish even (my friend had a mare for years who just put her ears back and snaked her head at anyone who came within ten feet including her, but they had a huge and deep bond). You obviously adore him and they do feel our love & feelings towards them. Play running games with him in the field, I do that, even if I think people will see, lol!