|
|
Post by wabuska on May 28, 2011 12:24:04 GMT 1
I've been pestered by ideas of retiring from riding recently and I don't know how much longer I can fight it off. I'm still recovering but it's been a couple of months now, and my enthusiasm is still dead, it's just dead.
Flynns' only 7, so it's a dillema as I don't want to loan him out. He's always going to be a challenge and not a horse to take me on new ventures like say hunter trials etc. He's just too much horse for this girl to realistically train up any further.
My daughter is riding well and at the point of getting her first pony and I've realised that the fantasy of us riding out together is possibly just that. She takes no interest in my riding or schooling and I've had to drag her to watch me do anything in competition or out. Unless it's about them, they really don't care. I find that difficult as I thought we would be doing things together not just for her.
It has to be more about her now I now that's the generous parental thing to say, and at least the arena won't go to waste. Very confused.
|
|
|
|
Post by jules26 on May 28, 2011 20:45:53 GMT 1
Oh Kanga I'm so sorry to read your dilemma!
You dont say how old your daughter is - maybe this is just a phase she is going through - is she too young to be interested
in your schooling etc for long??
Is it a question of only being able to have one horse or pony?
|
|
|
|
Post by wabuska on May 28, 2011 22:47:18 GMT 1
No, I have the facilities here. It's nothing grand, but I'm lucky enough to have room for 2-3 at home and my elderly pony probably only has a year or two left in her before I'll have to make a decision. I think as my husband points out I'm letting a negative phase with my girl collide with my confusion about riding and 2 and 2 is making 5, not sense! She's 7. I'm probably expecting too much.
|
|
|
|
Post by lizpurlo on May 28, 2011 23:08:47 GMT 1
Kanga, I'm so so sorry to read this, you've been such an inspiration with your lovely Flynn, and now you're well over the worst of times with him too. I was so thrilled to read about your terrific Trec results too, and really thought this was the start of a whole new chapter. I kind of know how you feel, I'm like it too, but the difference is I'm twice your age!!
Don't even think about loaning him out, or backing down and concentrating on your wee girl. If she wants to ride and do exciting things on a pony, she will, and parental pressure either way probably won't make a jot of difference.
Maybe your illness has really knocked you for six? - in which case a break from riding might be helpful. I know what has always made me get back in the saddle again after not riding for a while has been watching other people riding and having fun... maybe go and steward at a fun ride or a Trec..... that's always made me feel like getting back in the swing again.
Best of luck with whatever you decide to do, and be kind on yourself. x
|
|
|
|
Post by wabuska on May 29, 2011 15:58:25 GMT 1
Thanks Liz........... I'm certainly not HALF your age (you're not in your 90s are you?)..... but thank you for that idea...!!! XX Lunged today, yes, I know not very IH, but he's so wonderful at it, and canters off a kiss etc., it's relaxing and fun for us both. Free jumping.. another winner with him, no guide required, so a nice afternoon, with the pressure off. It's nice to be reminded of how good they are.. gave him a bath to finish, no line, no nothing, he just stands there by the tap, very awake but doing what's asked.
|
|
|
|
Post by rifruffian on May 29, 2011 16:30:40 GMT 1
If you are not mentally and physically up and not enthusiastic for it, make the decision to quit personal riding. But keep the horse and such facilities as you have.
In years to come, things may change.
|
|
|
|
Post by fth on May 29, 2011 20:12:59 GMT 1
Hi kanga. Feel I have missed lots as had no idea you were feeling so low re riding. I do think illness takes a huge toll on motivation and also it sounds a sif you are having to accept the loss of a dream (riding inharmony with your daughter). But that loss is likely onlyntemporary , after all she is only seven and very much the centre of her own world right now. Wait a while , maybe quite a while and it may still happen.
Meanwhile create some new dreams of your own. Take the free schooling and turn it into liberty work to die for, have FUN with Flynn and rediscover the joy of your partnership
Hugs
Cathy
|
|
|
|
Post by wabuska on May 30, 2011 14:47:53 GMT 1
X. Strangely, that's where we are right now Cathy. I have been lunging and doing liberty jumping with him and he's a dream right now. Cantering from a kiss since yesterday and today cantered from a kiss in the woods. I'll try to take the pressure off as the horse is not leaving and he's a great lad. Thanks RR, always solid good advice.
|
|
|
|
Post by mandal on May 30, 2011 17:53:43 GMT 1
Hope you don't mind me following you on here kanga.  If you do give up riding and retire Flynn this is not an irreversible decision and who knows in the future. In the meantime go with your instincts and do stuff you both enjoy. Take care x ps. Might be worth a blood screen if you haven't had one done recently. On you I mean. lol |
|
|
|
Post by julz on May 30, 2011 19:59:33 GMT 1
Only just seen this, and don't visit this section very often... I don't know if this will help but.... I've had a few serious ops over the yrs.. each time I had one, recovery was fairly long and I couldn't wait to get back in the saddle... each time something in me has told me to wait until im properly ready to ride again... the first few times I had either Oldie or more recently Seamus to get on, I knew both these guys so well I would trust my life with them (OK more oldie than Seamus) Both of them are now gone  which has actually made it harder and given me the excuse to wait even longer after the last op which was the knee replacement in sept 09. possibly stupidly I took on a pony that turned out to have dangerous issues... I took him back to basics and re taught him things he already knew but to "re programme" it back into him.. he's now working consistantly, but i've never really had the urge to get on him and do it myself.. I have ridden him, but mainly on the quiet roads of the village where he lives... I havent been I must ride/I want to ride today... if i felt confident enough I would take him out and really enjoy it, if E was riding then that was even better as it let me off the hook. She'e leaving in Sept to go to Uni in a different city  will mis her greatly but Jay is going so well now, there's really no excuse for me not to get on and school him. Two weeks ago I boxed him over to the livery where the others were kept and used thier school.. he was great  I really enjoyed it... didnt ride him again til Saturday when I decided on Friday I was going to school him and take him to the Polo fields ( i hate wide open spaces on horseback) but he was good as gold.. worked hard for me... hey we even had a canter ;D I now feel more positive about riding him there again doing more schooling and having much needed lessons. Maybe we'll even get to some dressage tests this year? What im trying to say is.. don't feel you must ride... further Flynns schooling with in-hand work, do different things, maybe get a sharer for him who you could teach how to ride him, and who could take on most of the riding so you can have a break... I know you've not been well and sometimes this can hinder you, but if you can make it work in a better way for you, then perhaps in time you will feel the confidence coming back and want to ride a bit more. |
|
|
|
Post by sarahlev on Jun 1, 2011 14:39:03 GMT 1
Hi.
I've only just seen this. Kanga, I feel for you. I've been feeling like this for ages. I've still got my two boys and feel so guilty because I hardly do anything with them.
So what can I say? Nothing to add to what others have said. But thinking of you xx
|
|
|
|
Post by wabuska on Jun 1, 2011 15:40:26 GMT 1
Really appreciate the feedback. It's good to know I'm not alone and peaks and trough happen. X
|
|
|
|
Post by Louise C on Jun 1, 2011 21:13:13 GMT 1
My feeling from reading this Kanga is that you're still getting over your illness - give it time and take the pressure off yourself and just do the things you enjoy doing together. Your daughter is still very young to be doing things with you - and yes life is all about them!
|
|
|
|
Post by gordo on Jun 2, 2011 8:44:18 GMT 1
Hi Kanga, you have a great horse so hang onto him whatever you do! As everyone says, you need some emotional space so just potter about with Flynn and don't get on him until you feel 'well' again. Re your daughter, don't put your dreams on hold for her. She is very young and a very lucky girl to be looking at getting her own pony but she could change her mind next month and decide no more horses! Encourage her but not at your expense, you and hubby have worked hard to get what you have and she has many many years ahead to achieve her dreams. You don't want her turning into a monster you see at shows so she has to learn that supporting mum is AS important as her own riding. I have a 7 year old and know how wilful they are!! Keep at it xx
|
|
|
|
Post by jennyb on Jun 2, 2011 8:47:48 GMT 1
Don't worry about it, just have a little break from riding if you need it. You were doing fantastically well and really enjoying Flynn before you got ill, so I'm sure you'll get your riding mojo back at some point in the future. |
|
which has actually made it harder and given me the excuse to wait even longer after the last op which was the knee replacement in sept 09. 
will mis her greatly but Jay is going so well now, there's really no excuse for me not to get on and school him.
I really enjoyed it... didnt ride him again til Saturday when I decided on Friday I was going to school him and take him to the Polo fields ( i hate wide open spaces on horseback) but he was good as gold.. worked hard for me... hey we even had a canter ;D I now feel more positive about riding him there again doing more schooling and having much needed lessons. Maybe we'll even get to some dressage tests this year?
