Pezza
Advanced Poster
Sonny
Posts: 497
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Jumping
Mar 29, 2007 13:58:49 GMT 1
Post by Pezza on Mar 29, 2007 13:58:49 GMT 1
Right, i am scared of jumping I have never had a very bad fall, but was at a pc rally doing xc. Went cantering towards a jump that was on a very steep hill. Sonny stopped. tried again, he stopped, dropped his shoulder and i came off, but was stood up. He ran away as he panics, and bucked, catching me with one of his feet, i had a gash just above my eye and a massive dint in my hat. Had to have stitches. Obviously i couldn't get back on. Was fine after this, had a jumping lesson 5 days after, with stitches still in, and jumped a 3'3 spread, so was fine. Got gradually more nervous over the next couple of months. I went to PC camp. was doing jumping and the instructer put up a big jump, about 3ft, and i asked her to please put it down a hole as i didn't feel comfortable jumping that high after my accident, which she knew about. she shouted at me, calling me pathetic and a baby and told me to go and stand away from the group. i did and had a cry cos i was upset at being called pathetic and angry with her for being like that when i was genuinely terrified and shaking. Afew months later, Sonny pulled a tendon, which lead to laminitiis and so i wasn't jumping very much at all. Now i shake like a leaf and can hardly make myself look at a jump, never mind go over it. Sorry for the long post, but i really want to concor this fear, as I am not exactly sure what i am scared of, as i am otherwise a confident rider.
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Jumping
Mar 29, 2007 14:42:59 GMT 1
Post by amarche on Mar 29, 2007 14:42:59 GMT 1
hi Pezza - well firstly there's nothing to be ashamed or embarrassed about - you are simply reacting to an event that caused you trauma and in your mind you're stopping yourself from being hurt/injured again. That's self-preservation and that's what keeps us safe. However, jumping is meant to be fun and enjoyable and I think you probably need to start by asking yourself whether you actually WANT to jump again or whether you feel you OUGHT to jump again, maybe pride or something? Your instructress at the rally should have a real slap in my opinion, that is bang out of order to bully someone like that. Anyway, either one is ok! If you want to do it then I'd prob start by finding someone you trust to help you, maybe another instructor or a friend but def one that is going to listen to you and respect you enough when you start to work through your fears. I'd then look at breaking down the fear, is it the fear of a jump? the height? the approach? the fall? or maybe the fact that you lost control of the situation (nofault or blame there - it's an accident remember! )and were kicked. Perhaps from there start to take little goals (tiny minute ones) towards the bigger goal and make sure you set yourself up to succeed every time. Just my thoughts, hope they help
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Jumping
Mar 29, 2007 14:48:01 GMT 1
Post by Hannah on Mar 29, 2007 14:48:01 GMT 1
What a horrid pc instructor! You had a bad fall and were understandably nervous. It sounds like you need to start right at the beginning with jumping, with the help of a sympathetic instructor. I'd start with poles on the ground and very gradually increase the size of the jump, using grids, and never going beyond what you are happy with. Good luck
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emmab
Olympic Poster
Olympic Poster
Posts: 674
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Jumping
Mar 29, 2007 15:03:41 GMT 1
Post by emmab on Mar 29, 2007 15:03:41 GMT 1
what a b*****y awful instructor to do that to you!! sounds like she could be the cause of your ongoing lack of confidence and i'm not surprised you were upset, anyone would be. i'd be inclined to write a letter of complaint about her to the pc if i were you. stupid woman! anyway, rant over. you have absolutely nothing to feel ashamed about, everyone gets nerves at some point and yours are perfectly justified, but you can get over them. don't put so much preesure on yourself, theres no time limit for these things so go at your own pace and do things only when you feel comfortable. set yourself up to succeed every ride so as long as you've had a nice ride and you've ended on a good note, thats great! with no pressure (from yourself or anyone else) i'm sure you'll find that you wanna do more and more as your confidence re-builds. perhaps set up a course of small jumps in your arena/field to school around. dont have any agenda to jump them at all, just put them in your schooling area so as you and your horse get used to them being there without there being any nerves - your horse will pick up on any pre-jumping nerves from you so in doing this, you're making the jumps being there a normal, un-exciting thing. do this for however long you want to and if in a few days/weeks you feel like popping over one, then do. the go back to your schooling. so basically you're incoorperating it into your schooling routine rather than making a concerted plan that 'you will jump today'. no pressure remember. do as much as you want to do and you'll probably surprise yourself. let us know how u get on. xx
p.s dont ever have a lesson with that idiot woman again
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Jumping
Mar 29, 2007 15:41:26 GMT 1
Post by swallowsmum on Mar 29, 2007 15:41:26 GMT 1
thats a horrible way to treat somebody, especially after a fall.
find yourself a nice sympathetic instructor that will let you work at your own pace and who knows how to help you rebuild your confidence. you are obviously very capable, but just need to learn how to enjoy yourself again.
ive had jumping nerves, but with the help of my instructor who pushes me (but in a nice way as i fully trust her to never make me do something thats beyond my ability) my confidence is growing each time i go. im now starting to believe in myself, which in turn makes my horse more confident as im begining to trust her more and devlop a partnership. the more i can believe in myself, the less nervous i become as the "i can't" turns into "i can". its taken time, but im getting there. ( and learning alot about myself on the way!)
give yourself time, don't pressurise yourself and enjoy. if you're not happy doing something, go back a few steps until you feel better.
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Pezza
Advanced Poster
Sonny
Posts: 497
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Post by Pezza on Apr 5, 2007 21:33:43 GMT 1
Thank you for your comments guys. I have managed a few small jumps in the menage on my 13h pony, who just takes me over the jump and ignores what i am doing on top , although i think that helps a bit, and I was shaking like a leaf after the jump each time, even tho it was tiny, but i was glad that i did it. i do want to jump again as i used to enjoy it and had come 3rd at a xc competition and was having sj lessons, so it was hard to find that i was so scared, i don't know how i managed to start a xc course, i could never do that now. i do feel that the instructor did not help my fear at all, and maybe that she did worsen it by making me feel as small as a pee and embarrising me in front of my friends who were in that rally. Thank you again, i will keep you updated
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Post by wozzer on Apr 5, 2007 21:43:28 GMT 1
Blimey I am shocked at that instructor! Well done you for even wanting to try after being bullied and embarassed like that - she wants shooting!!!!!
Anyway, some good advice on here for you. Best of luck. Let us know how you get on. xx
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Post by kya on Apr 6, 2007 8:46:15 GMT 1
I'm so amazed at the dreadful behaviour of that instructor. If you have the chance and there is a PC organiser you can go to... let it be known what happened to you. You poor thing. She/he is probably going around damaging riders' confidence day in, day out. Put it behind you, it's a mark of their bad character, not your lack of nerve. Clearly you have tons of that.
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bumble
Grand Prix Poster
SCOUT
Posts: 1,548
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Post by bumble on Apr 7, 2007 17:20:56 GMT 1
I was at the rally when this happened jump was hardly 3 ft pezza I know how nervous you have been about jumps hun and i have no idea why your just weird LOL! The arguement got out of hand as i think instructor didnt understand whyyou wouldnt jump cuz you already had jumped it then she put it up 2 holes! We were in the 2nd of the two top rides so we were both obviously confident enough to jump so she was angry that you wouldnt try! It got a little heated cuz you gave just as much back to her (a bit cheeky) You lost your bottle i know and i have no idea why cuz you flew round the xc with me and eddie Im sure it will get better we will have to blind fold ya ;D Instuctor really not that bad (i know pezza now hates her ) but she did act out of character that day bumble xxxxxxx
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cesca
Novice Poster
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Post by cesca on Apr 7, 2007 20:02:32 GMT 1
What about the reason she explains quite clearly in her first post? Sounds more than enough to knock someone's jumping confidence to me.
Pezza that's a horrible accident to have had but I'm sure you'll get over it - you are attacking the problem so I know you will. I think getting on your pony is an excellent idea. I too am freaking out about jumping, this time last year I would jump nothing at all, so I can totally relate. Best of luck to you and I'm sure in no time you'll be back, better than before xxx
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bumble
Grand Prix Poster
SCOUT
Posts: 1,548
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Post by bumble on Apr 7, 2007 22:06:36 GMT 1
What about the reason she explains quite clearly in her first post? Sounds more than enough to knock someone's jumping confidence to me. She is my best friend so not having a go ok! She was fine after sonny caught her as she has explained she had jumping lessons and jumped huge spreads it is since that she is petrified of jumps PLUS it was a Joke Hence the LOL after it !!! If you knew her youd know she was weird anyways (also JOKE Cesca!!!) she knows i love her bumble xx
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cesca
Novice Poster
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Post by cesca on Apr 7, 2007 22:11:42 GMT 1
Ok bumble I'll let yous off
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Pezza
Advanced Poster
Sonny
Posts: 497
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Jumping
Apr 10, 2007 12:39:51 GMT 1
Post by Pezza on Apr 10, 2007 12:39:51 GMT 1
Went on a fun ride yesterday, aaaannnnddddd........................... I jumped ;D Did 5 in a row, AND they were optional ;D ;D Harvey was a star and just took me bless him. I was shaking almost uncontrollably after for about 10 mins but was proud and pleased that I had managed to do them. ;D ;D PS Bumble, we are never going to agree on what happened that day. i know i am a stubborn sod , but i jump when i feel confident enough to do so, not when someone else tries to force me to jump stupidly high when i don't feel up to it.
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cesca
Novice Poster
Posts: 9
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Jumping
Apr 10, 2007 12:47:04 GMT 1
Post by cesca on Apr 10, 2007 12:47:04 GMT 1
Yay! Airborne again . You should be very proud of yourself, especially as they are optional (I always come back off fun rides beating myself up if I haven't jumped every fence!). Well done!!!
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Jumping
Apr 10, 2007 13:20:34 GMT 1
Post by kya on Apr 10, 2007 13:20:34 GMT 1
Well done. What a great achievement!
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