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Post by portiabuzz on Mar 20, 2014 18:03:48 GMT 1
its wierd if i take Casper out alone i dont feel it as am with him
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Post by kellysf on Apr 2, 2014 1:32:32 GMT 1
I have read all of your posts, I think you have done fantastic and given me lots of ideas to help me work through my nerves that I seem to grow the min I know I am getting on! I love the "husband hunting" idea too its really good as it gives you something to focus on other than nerves. I often feel stupid at my yard but reading the things on here make me feel totally normal. thank you x
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Post by portiabuzz on Apr 2, 2014 10:41:55 GMT 1
aww bless you
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Post by mygirlgmissy on Apr 10, 2014 11:54:52 GMT 1
The title of this thread no longer applies lol! Have been taking Gypsy out on our own a lot more recently, which was going brilliantly well. My nerves were slowly disappearing and I wasn't getting nervous about riding her. Then the spring grass came... Along with her first season... Last weekend was awful!! Took her out along with hubby on his bike, doing some 'husband-hunting' down the bridle path - cantering along behind him while he pedals furiously, petrified Gypsy is going to trample him lol - we got halfway down and I asked her for walk, to which Gypsy's reply was to rear and spin as usual. My girth wasn't tight enough and my saddle slipped mid spin which freaked her out and made her bolt, so there was a heart stopping moment I thought I was going to fall off. Somehow managed to right myself and sort saddle out and regain control, by which time I was freaked and I got off her and walked her home. Didn't want to ride her all week This wkend I tried riding her again, was really nervous but she was brilliant. We had a lovely hack out in the sunshine, trotted and cantered home (while following hubby on the bike) and no problems at all. I have just re-read all of my posts on this thread, and amazed at how far I have come since my very first post. I am no longer scared, I have overcome my cantering fear, if Gypsy spins then I make her continue spinning so she is beginning to learn that spinning gets her nowhere. If she doesn't spin, then she doesn't rear. Everything is so much better, and as a result my confidence is greatly improved!! I know if we have a bad day, we will also have many good days in return. Big plans for summer, maybe including a fun ride or two, so am over the moon! Many thanks to all of you who have helped me over the last few months, it's been wonderful having people who know what I have been through and can help You're all wonderful, thank you xx Well... kinda shot myself in the foot with this post. Unfortunately, Gypsy is up for sale. I'm in two minds whether or not to keep her, deep down i know that selling her on would ruin her, but i really don't feel that i'm the right person for her anymore. We have come soooo far, yet the last few times have ridden her out she does something naughty, and i end up walking her back. Last Sunday i rode her out, we got less than 10 mins away from the yard and she reared/span and tried to bolt off... i freaked out, got off her and then she bolted home. Husband sped off to find her and found her munching grass a short walk away from the yard. My confidence is shot to pieces, its weird because i've not gone back to wanting or needing hubby to lead me around the village again... i'm not at 'that' point again.. i just don't want to ride her any more. I'm at that 'making excuses not to ride' stage again. *sigh* I feel that she's become too much for me. Yet she isn't doing anything too new or unusual. Same old Gypsy. I think i've just had enough of doing so well for a little while, then repeatedly going back to square one. I know if i do sell her, then i won't be wanting another horse and to go through it all again. Am absolutely gutted and in pieces. Just goes to show that confidence is lost just as quickly as it is gained.
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Post by portiabuzz on Apr 10, 2014 12:18:04 GMT 1
sending big to you xxx
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margom
Novice Poster
Posts: 17
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Post by margom on Apr 13, 2014 20:40:22 GMT 1
Reading this thread you can't think that you go back to square one after each blip, you don't. You have genuine reason to be wary, that's cop on, you have ba***. You have taken a horse that had bolted reared etc out on your own! My horse jerked his head and I fell off and that set me to thinking the same thing. My horse didn't rear or bolt and I'm afraid, after getting to a stage where I could go and ride by myself (in an arena ). I need you to not give up, to be the person I'm looking to, that few steps ahead of me to give me hope. I hope you haven't sold her! There's a phrase by some one. "Nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know". Keep at it! :-)
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Post by mygirlgmissy on Apr 14, 2014 16:12:02 GMT 1
Reading this thread you can't think that you go back to square one after each blip, you don't. You have genuine reason to be wary, that's cop on, you have ba***. You have taken a horse that had bolted reared etc out on your own! My horse jerked his head and I fell off and that set me to thinking the same thing. My horse didn't rear or bolt and I'm afraid, after getting to a stage where I could go and ride by myself (in an arena ). I need you to not give up, to be the person I'm looking to, that few steps ahead of me to give me hope. I hope you haven't sold her! There's a phrase by some one. "Nothing ever goes away until it teaches us what we need to know". Keep at it! :-) Thank you so much for your reply I don't often take time to realise how far i have brought her. When you pointed it out like that, it makes me realise exactly how far we've come. My husband wouldn't let me sell Gypsy. He made me take all of the adverts down lol. He has made me realise i have come so far with her, it would be devastating to have to give up on her now. He pointed out all the bad habits i have trained her out of, all the stuff she has done.... Every rear and spin that i have controlled and rectified... saving myself from falling and then regaining control when she bolted ... the rearing at the mounting block problems... controlling her when she decided to rear and spin into heavy traffic in the middle of the high street... and the fact that when we were at our old yard, i couldn't even get her out of the yard gate without her going vertical, even in company. I have trained that horse to stand while mounted, she is now used to being on her own in field without freaking out, she is now used to being ridden out on her own and i can now get her out of the gate without any problems. She will now go in front while in company and stay there without freaking out. She will now face something 'scary' whilst on her own without any drama. I have given that horse confidence, and the difference in her since i bought her, and the huge difference in her since we moved to our new yard, is all my own doing. I should be proud of her, and myself. I am taking a step back, not forcing myself to go out on my own anymore. In the hope that if the pressure is off, then i may just hop on her one day and bimble out on our own again. Its not her, its me. For some reason i'm now unable to correct her, or tell her off if she starts being silly. I just sit there, totally frozen forgetting what my legs and hands are supposed to do lol. My whole confidence issue is related to the way i overthink, and then in turn, over worry myself. I convinced myself i was terrified again, so when i went to ride her on Friday I was genuinely absolutely terrified. I asked her for trot in a small open field, and i freaked thinking she was going to bolt home. She didn't put a foot wrong, yet i still got off her. Went home in tears, absolutely devastated at myself getting so low again. Until my 14yr old son turned and said "why are you getting so upset about a bloody horse?!" Something made me realise i get myself so wound up and i put far too much pressure on myself, that riding turns into a chore and i don't want to ride at all. Have arranged to go out in company with a couple of girls from my yard. One of which wants us to load up the ponies and go trailer off somewhere and have a good old blast, which i'm really looking forward to. Canter/galloping in company doesn't bother me, yet on my own it really does worry me lol. I know as soon as i've had one good ride on Gypsy in company, that i'll suddenly regain the b***s to do it on my own again. I also have a feeling that i'll never truly be 'cured' but hey, every step counts.. not matter how small
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Post by alonerawnut on Apr 14, 2014 23:23:55 GMT 1
It's so important to take stock of how far you've come - you've got an issue to work through now, but it doesn't seem so big when you look back at all those previous issues you've successfully overcome.
Is there someone else's horse or a riding school / trekking place you could go to, to ride a less complicated horse to get your mojo back? I sometimes struggle with confidence issues, so I have a confidence-boosting lesson on a mischievous pony, tearing round a set of jumps and I suddenly remember that I can ride! When I'm next on a tricky horse, I've got that muscle-memory of how it feels to ride that naughty pony and it helps to stop me tensing up.
I think it's a great idea to take some of the pressure off yourself. You could also talk through with someone what your strategy would be the next time she does spin / tank off. I find that having a plan of action in my head beforehand really helps.
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Post by portiabuzz on Apr 15, 2014 12:02:24 GMT 1
am so pleased you have stood back and realised how far you have come i hope that with your Husbands support and others you go far xxx
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Post by portiabuzz on Apr 15, 2014 12:02:42 GMT 1
and dont forget to tell us how its going xx
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Post by mygirlgmissy on May 14, 2014 13:29:14 GMT 1
**UPDATE** Gypsy had to have some time off, due to a tight shoulder. Seems the saddle has been tipping me forward onto her shoulders. No wonder the poor girly had been acting out Gypsy and i are still taking it day by day, but it seems things have changed. I've been making a point of working with her every day, either long reining/walking in hand/riding and we're really coming along nicely. I've become more confident in handling her and a teeny bit more confident in riding her. Have got an instructor coming out weekly to help us both and it really has boosted my confidence. She's helping us work out Gypsy's 'safety zone' and given me homework to extend it to beyond the yard gate. She's also highlighted the fact that if i think something bad is going to happen, i freeze and make Gypsy react. Have had brand new saddle fitted and have taken her out of her harsh Waterford/Gag bits and put her in a milder sweet iron roller link snaffle. The results are AMAZING! Tried her on a hack (in company) this weekend and she was a lot happier and more forward going. Tried her in a canter around the lakes and usually she'd do a few strides then ask for trot again. This time however, i asked for canter and she went beautifully. Then she decided to burst into gallop and jump some puddles because there was a speedboat and water skiers on the lake behind us. She stopped as soon as i asked her to though. It's all coming along nicely, and that is purely because i refuse to continue worrying myself and panicking. It may be my new point of view, but her rears are no longer rears anymore, they're just sideways bunnyhops when she's not sure on something i've asked her to do and i actually find them quite amusing lol. I've realised that i've had to confront my confidence issues, in order to gain Gypsy's confidence. Oh, and we've entered some fun rides... One is next weekend, on the 25th, but not sure if i want to do that one (apparently its a 'fast' one, where people just bomb past you. Not quite the experience i'd be looking for lol) BUT we are going on a 12 mile fun ride on 22nd June, really can't wait
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Post by portiabuzz on May 14, 2014 13:52:52 GMT 1
am so pleased to read this, you must be beaming from ear to ear Let us know how they go, sounds very exciting and should be a nice reward for all your hard work. Great support from hubby too. Made my day your update has!
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Post by Emma on May 24, 2014 9:26:36 GMT 1
Just catching up on your post, its great to see the work you have done with gypsy.
Sometimes its easy to focus on what's going wrong at that moment when something happens and forget how much things have got better. I know this from my experience with my horse Rocky.
I'm currently going through some fear issues with Rocky of similar issues to yours. Ive found giving myself small goals and taking as much time as I think he needs before moving to the next one. This has removed a lot of pressure for me & I've enjoyed our slower pace. Don't know if this helps but thought I would share.
To continue as you have where some may not, in challenging times as these, shows a lot of guts & creditability. Gypsy is lucky to have you xx
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Post by portiabuzz on May 24, 2014 11:03:10 GMT 1
lovely post Emma very true xx
Sent from my GT-I8160
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Post by mygirlgmissy on May 27, 2014 2:12:45 GMT 1
Hi guys! Well, i was in two minds on whether or not to take part in the 'scary' fun ride this weekend, but i decided to be brave and go and i'm so glad i did! I don't know how to add pics on here so have changed my prof pic to one that was taken of us at the fun ride during a fantastic canter/gallop. Think our faces says it all really haha! Gypsy behaved brilliantly, considering i decided not to change her bit and kept her in her snaffle, she was AMAZING!!! I was a bit nervous to start with, but we had got to a giant field and i decided that to let her go rather than fight her, so we had a good blast and after that there was no stoppng us At this present moment in time my confidence is soaring and i'm so so so happy
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