dcjovi
Elementary Poster
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Post by dcjovi on Aug 15, 2013 21:17:34 GMT 1
I've browsed this board as a guest many times but have finally decided to join in! My background is this....Old ,reliable mare was retired for 3 years before having to be put to sleep.I didn't ride in this time.Purchased a very beautiful exracer who my head said was too much but my heart fell head over heels in love with.He was a loving boy and i wanted him so bad I overcame my lack of confidence over the months to ride him on short accompanied hacks down the road but was too scared to ride out on my own or even to take him 'off road'. He was really very good but my head constantly told me he was about to ' explode' TB style.After having almost the whole winter off because I didn't have a hacking buddy, having a horrendous ride and getting dumped in spectacular fashion with a long walk home, I decided with a heavy heart to sell him.I p/ex'd him for what was described as a super hack/any body ride.I was heart broken at what I had done and was faced with a new horse who napped badly and who I wanted nothing to do with. I just wanted my beautiful boy back.My new girl was then blamed for bringing strangles to the yard.After weeks of only being able to groom in a stable I finally accepted that this new girl was what I had and I should get on with it or sell and call it a day! My confidence was so low I didn't even want to get on a horse.A friend long reined Dream (new girl) long enough to make her sweat and I was persuaded to get on her and be led round on lead rein.This was just what I needed.Luckily she gave me a couple of days of short hacks that upped my confidence loads as she was super in traffic etc.She then went back to napping on leaving the yard but I was able to ride her forwards enough without my legs going to jelly and thats where we're at now. Shes still thinks about napping but ridden daily she's more amenable to going out. My next goal is to ride out on our own, something I love to do....just need to do baby steps again to achieve it
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Post by lesleyking1 on Aug 16, 2013 12:21:43 GMT 1
Hi welcome on board!
what a bad time! horses-heart breaking.
Don't beat yourself up over the TB, they are a massive drain on your confidence, I have read loads of stuff on them after getting mine and you cant guarantee they are all nutty, loads can be big plods but then more just need to be in real experts hands. Now I'm no expert and I have had to do some real tough soul searching to decide what to do with mine and now riding will happen if it ever does, I'm no spring chicken and there are plenty of others on the yard if I fancy a hack out, as she is such a dear on the ground and very pretty she should do well in-hand classes so I've satisfied my conscience that she will have a role, but if riding was my first priority then she would have had to go.
It sounds like there is still some bond forming to do with Dream, It's great you're hacking in company but try just walking her out in hand or get on and have a leader, then you will be building trust and not facing scary issues on her back when you are in a situation that may not end well, focus on getting out and less on needing to be on her back, then I'm sure the baby steps will go well.
Let us know the progress.
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dcjovi
Elementary Poster
Posts: 50
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Post by dcjovi on Aug 16, 2013 23:21:02 GMT 1
Thank you for understanding.Although I p/exd my boy ,he did go straight to a lovely lady.I'm sure he will have a much happier life with her as I always felt it must have been horrible for him to be ridden by someone who never quite trusted him and only had the courage to plod down the road and back.He is young beautiful horse with a lifetime of future in front of him. Dream was broken at 4 and then pretty much left for 3 years before being sent to a sale a couple of weeks before christmas! How anyone could do that to a horse beggars belief. Theres then a 3 month gap, she was sent to another sale and then found her way to a dealers yard 200 miles from her original home.Then she landed on my doorstep so to speak.Not quite what I was told and definitely not what I planned.I feel shes had a very stressful time and I can't in all conscience sell her as I feel she would be a constant problem horse,passed from pillar to post.I don't believe I have the skills to help her but am going to give it a damn good try.She's so sweet to do with but turns into a moody nappy mare when you get on her.We,ve already come further than I could imagine but think its going to be a long road.If I get to the stage where I wake up in a morning without stressing about Dream I'll know we've made it lol.
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dcjovi
Elementary Poster
Posts: 50
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Post by dcjovi on Aug 16, 2013 23:51:25 GMT 1
Just like to add that I found out all Dreams history after I'd bought her!
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Post by lesleyking1 on Aug 17, 2013 15:46:40 GMT 1
It's fantastic you have this commitment for her. The best thing I did with my girl was getting an RA involved. She was expensive but she gave me loads to work on so I didn't need her for another couple of months then on her next visit we moved on to another level of work. I am a foster carer and something I think of with the kids when they come and it applies to horses to, is try not to focus on the history, as feeling sorry can be a bit counterproductive, be fair, allow time and its the trust that mends the past then you get a very special bond.
is that her you are on in the pic? I love mares, bloody madames at times but when you do get an understanding it is very special.
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dcjovi
Elementary Poster
Posts: 50
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Post by dcjovi on Aug 18, 2013 23:07:01 GMT 1
So pleased!!! Managed to walk dream round the yard and down the drive all alone today....she felt like she was going to nap but I kept speaking to her and she did it.Alright its not much but considering my legs where like jelly she did really really well, I didn't give her that much help. Going to do alot more ground work with her as you suggested. Not going to be made to feel silly. Going to practice standing at the mounting block this week (in hand) as shes now decided to take advantage there! yes, its me on dream in the pic, was the day I finally sat on her, my smile says it all
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Post by lesleyking1 on Aug 19, 2013 9:46:09 GMT 1
Mounting block, as you probably remember from yours, ex-racers don't stand at mounting blocks, I saw how Monty trains to the mounting block and this works fantastic and really impressive when all the experts and the fancy horses are dancing around everywhere, lol. Do you have Monty's regular emails, I cant remember how I started getting them.
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 20, 2013 13:10:34 GMT 1
Oh DC that sounds soooooooolike my daughter and her old lady Crystal when she first got her.........the first 6 months were the most awful of my life and daughters, everyday brought a fresh challenge and she got loads of advice from' sell it or shoot it' to 'beat the hell out it and then get on' but she ignored all of that and went her own way, starting off with baby steps to progressing to riding out on her own, and was the crunch for me, if she rode her out and came back intact and still on horse then I knew she had not won, but got a partnership going.........and that partnership still endures today, they would walk through hell and fire for each other.
Its a case sometimes of gritting your teeth and telling yourself ' I can do this and I will do this' and thats what you are doing now, and it will all pay off in time, you will look back on this post one day and think to yourself 'what on earth was all that angst about then' ...........onward snd upwards.
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Post by portiabuzz on Aug 21, 2013 22:18:33 GMT 1
Welcome to the forum and thank you for sharing your story and the pic of you and Dream xxx keep at it, your caring nature shines through in your posts xxx
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dcjovi
Elementary Poster
Posts: 50
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Post by dcjovi on Aug 22, 2013 22:28:31 GMT 1
Thank you for your post christine08...it really gave me hope and I hope one day I will look back and realise how far we've come! loved that it turned out well for your daughter. I appreciate your welcome and kind words portiabuzz. We've had a mixed bag of success this week.Great hack out with friend, the most relaxed ride we've ever had. No napping/bucking although we did stick to road. Today we went back a step as Dream decided for reasons unknown that she didn't want to walk in front and we had a few iffy moments .However my confidence is improving lots as I've realised that she's not going to buck,spin and bolt for home as her thing is to buck and plant her feet! My legs didn't go to jelly today and we did carry on the ride as planned so guess thats a huge improvement already!! I'm actually beginning to like her
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Deleted
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Post by Deleted on Aug 23, 2013 14:24:09 GMT 1
Thats huge step forward for both of you, well done!
Onwards and upwards!
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dcjovi
Elementary Poster
Posts: 50
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Post by dcjovi on Aug 24, 2013 22:31:52 GMT 1
Argh first 20 minutes of our hack today was a total nightmare.Bucked like a mad woman! Actually am begining to think it's hormonal as its seems to be forming a pattern. Still when you ride her through it she settles and is a lovely ride ,steady as a rock with traffic,cows,over road bridges.Guess she thinks I,'ve got okay on first leaving the yard so she's now throwing it in somewhere else.Horrid ride but ended on a good note......arghhhhhh
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Post by portiabuzz on Aug 28, 2013 13:46:40 GMT 1
ended on a good note is positive xx hope your ok
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dcjovi
Elementary Poster
Posts: 50
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Post by dcjovi on Aug 31, 2013 0:09:27 GMT 1
Thank you, yes am fine but after doing more groundwork and not riding the getting back in the saddle jitters are beginning to edge they're way back in, so frustrating! feeling a bit too old to deal with it this week.wondering if Dream needs a younger person with more time and confidence. Tried to tell her we'd be a perfect match if she could just stop the napping! Its such a shame as she is such a safe hack, nothing seems to bother her. Just having a self doubting week.....was thinking of having lessons but her bucks are worse in the school! She just doesn't like work but who can blame her
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Post by portiabuzz on Sept 11, 2013 23:28:18 GMT 1
Don't give up xx
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