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Post by cbc on Aug 12, 2008 13:16:20 GMT 1
Thanks for sharing your story, what a lousy time that poor mare has had. It helps me a lot hering of others who fight their demons, helps me fight mine.
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Post by rj on Aug 12, 2008 13:53:31 GMT 1
Oh good cbc; if that helps I am so pleased. I have never tried to deny my wibbles to myself, and I have tried not to let them take over, but I think I did let the situation get out of hand. That has made it more difficult to overcome - I made the rod for my own back! At my age - 58 next week, gulp! - I don't want to get injured. But having said that I never was particularly brave, & have always hated the feeling of being out of control. Until I got my own horse 20yrs ago however, I would ride any horse I got the chance to, either at riding schools or friends, as long as I knew they weren't rearers. When you have your own horse a) the relationship is very different and can be more stressful - total 'buck stops here' time, and b) you tend only to ride that horse and adapt to it. I found it relatively easy to give Tal the confidence she needed from the ground, but sincerely doubted my abilities to do the same in the saddle. I hope we get there in the next few weeks - just hoping for decent weather this evening now!
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Post by rj on Aug 15, 2008 10:05:08 GMT 1
NEXT: Yesterday has been the first opportunity to continue with our ridden work, The intervening time has been grooming, odd bit of groundwork and just chilling in the field with her. Was really looking forward to it, no butterfiles or wibbles! Tacked up and did the usual pre-flight checks on the ground, worked on her back up & halts to get her listening to me, which took 5mins or so until she was happy & relaxed to stand still. Then I judged it was the right time to get on. I felt that her back was bit hunched, but ignored that and worked through the rushed steps, encouraging her to bring her head down, by offering hands, and slow her walk. Again, halt was a bit hit & miss, & she didn't wadnt to stand still for long. I had clocked that there were some nasty flies bugging her, she was tail swishing furiously when I went to fetch her in - she came up to me again. That's getting solid now too, happy to come & see me. Another livery had worked in the paddock while we were getting ready and said she didn't know what was up with her normallly placid horse. So I am fairly sure my VERY thin-skinned mare was getting bitten to almost-distraction. We tried to outwit pesky flies by changing direction a lot, and not asking her to stand for too long. Again we stayed in walk throughout, though I was almost tempted to just let go into trot, but I'm not ready yet! But I allowed the reins & halter rope to get longer, the walk became that nice relaxed swing and she did lots of nose clearing. I do like to hear that. Just realised that I have been ignoring my NH basic exercises, and we don't have a 'lift/reach/relax' to stop with rope, a solid flex (tho did some work on that) so there's not a one rein stop. I think I'll get that sorted BEFORE we trot, then I will know we will def be able to stop, whatever, and that will give me more confidence. The surface of the paddock is awful, tussocky with slippy top surface at the moment, and I find that off putting, but just have to work with what we've got. I think I'll put some poles out for next session - which will be tonight, hopefully!
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Post by Zuzan on Aug 15, 2008 10:34:33 GMT 1
excellent rj.. sessions like that are great.. glad you've got the butterflies and wibbles sorted.. I fnd sessions like this are great as you can hold the calm work and feeling to reinforce yourself.. re the flies I've resorted to a Quiet Ride Fly Mask as the hoards of pesky b****rs around Nita's head were causing her to toss her head and hence made nice soft consistent contact on the reins really difficult.. but elsewhere have to rely on either my schooling wip or her tail.. best use of schooling whip .. flicking flies NB N has been desensitised to whips and ropes etc
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Post by rj on Aug 15, 2008 13:19:39 GMT 1
Thanks for that. I do rope swishing when I'm leading her, with the tail end & popper of my 12'. Sometimes she's fine, sometimes she's not, I just have to keep on trying, but not yet from on top, I feel. I have been purposely checking girth, leaning forward to tuck bridle straps in keepers, sweeping my hads down either side to try & get flies, and generally not pussy-footing around with her. She has to learn to cope with everything. I was on her for 40mins yesterday, which is the maximum I would do at the moment, as she does need to build up muscle. Roll on tonight!!
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Post by Susan on Aug 15, 2008 13:38:46 GMT 1
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D I have just stumbled on thsi thread, How did I miss it.. Row you have made me cry! the journey has been as much for you as for her and that is what got to me.. I have beleived in fate and much of our life happens for reasons. Maisie gave you so much as you did for her. Then Tal came along and needed YOU and because of Maise you were able to help her.. soo much.. and I think 100% she has helped you so much. Horses can humble us cant they.. not that you need humbling I still beleive you 2 should stay together! as you deserve each other for the best possible reasons but again what will be will be! I, like many here can empathise with your devils! and the I got on! but want to shout it from roof tops as it was such a big deal for us.. You did so much for Flynn at Toms last clinic and have inspired me such a lot and reading this you are still doing it! I have very big shoes to fill in September that is for sure. Thanks you so much for telling us of Your Success Story and the updates we look forward to! here was the right place for this not the PC section.. ;)keep it up! ( cyber hug)
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laura
Grand Prix Poster
going for a splash
Posts: 3,867
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Post by laura on Aug 15, 2008 23:01:49 GMT 1
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Post by rj on Aug 26, 2008 14:09:01 GMT 1
Over a week's gone by with no more riding. Can't explain why, wanted to get on with it but it just didn't.
Have spent plenty of time on the ground with her, trimmed her feet, took her for a short walk in hand, did some liberty etc.
Yesterday evening I was determined to get on again. I am trying to keep the ground work to the minimum so that eventually I can just get on, but I find helpful to do the pre-flight checks from the ground, and also practised some BeckyH long-lining techniques and did the circles etc that I wanted to when ridden.
Got on and she was really on her toes, but I now know she will calm down and it's just a case of keeping her thinking, using halt & back-up as well as figure 8s etc. There were a couple of spooky moments, once when she suddenly shied & shot forward - & that was one of my biggest fears, that I'd tip to one side, unbalance & scare her, then she'd ...... well I dunno, I fainted at that stage of the nightmare:-)
Anyway, nothing awful happened, I ignored the incident and we walked on round and back to the same place. I looked carefully at the ground and there was a tiny baby frog trying to steer through the tufty grass just making it move slightly - could've been a snake!
We did more of the usual stuff, she stayed on her toes for sometime, but I gradually fed out the rope and reins till she was on a long rein with slightest contact and became calm & relaxed.
Kept thinking 'I want to trot, she wants to trot' so eventually decided we had to give it a go. But not successful, she went into trot and I grabbed the reins ARGHHHHHH!
I flexed her to a walk and stop, and she was so good, but getting frustrated with being held back. Just went back to walking around the cones, changing the speed of the walk and making it as easy as poss.
Tried again at the trot, and did exactly the same. I know I need to ride her forward into trot and stay on small circles until we settle down. I know that. I really do know that. I do. My blimmin brain just doesn't send the messages through to the rest of me.
I think I will wait until there is someone else there, to stop the what if's (like suppose I fall of and am hurt too much to use my phone, and Tal is loose and about to get tangled up in reins, and supposing a meteor comes out of the sky....... you know the sort of thing!)
But I am feeling a lot more positive, that it will happen :-)
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Post by june on Aug 26, 2008 22:22:22 GMT 1
Maybe you should see if crash test dummy Jo will come out again and try trot first! She's pretty agile. Jumped off one of the polo ponies today before it threw a paddy!
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Post by rj on Aug 27, 2008 9:58:51 GMT 1
Mmm, I know that's an option (not taking Jo for granted, she has offered) but I think it's my responsibility, and believe I will get there - even if I have to wait til the Tom clinic at yours, where the surface is better etc.
I am sure I know what I should do, but at the moment there is just a crisis of confidence. Same as in walk, and we did get through that. I will see if I can organise the next try when one of the 2 other liveries are around. That will at lease remove the nightmare scenario!
Friends came over to meet Tal last night and they wanted to see her long-lining, so I showed them what we do with just halter & lines - no roller or bit. Haven't done that for a while as had gone on to long-lining in a saddle & bridle (but still clipped to halter not bit) as a preparation for riding.
I was really pleased with her, she did some excellent transitions, changes direction now at a word 'change', soft back up, and some sideways too. Friends were dead impressed (well they should have been at Becky's clinic, then they would have known better)!
we finished off with some liberty work, just in walk as the surface in the paddock is so poor I can't run on it. But she did circles, turns on haunches, back-up, sideways, halt etc very very well. We had a few confusing moments when she didn't understand and went through the repertoire to try & find out what I wanted. That gets her worried and confused, so we calmed down, started again and were off.
I will carry on working for a steady balanced trot on-line, then will be able to re-create it ridden. I WILL!
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Post by chrisbetson on Aug 28, 2008 19:39:35 GMT 1
Hi RJ, I know how you feel - I have the same feeling about riding my girl outside the school after the excitement of making crop circles! I have been doing ground work with her but I am going to get Kelly to test pilot her in the paddock before I try that for myself with Kelly or Hayley there in case - my brain tells me I can do it, I have done it in the past, but something just doesn't connect does it?
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Post by rj on Aug 29, 2008 9:57:45 GMT 1
Exactly Chris, there is a 'short' in my system!! However, a friend came to chack the saddle over yesterday - she is a saddle fitter I should add! First she checked Tal, then she checked the saddle, then she checked the saddle on Tal, then me on the saddle. Then she watched me ride - on walk of course - and said, 'can I see a trot' to which I said 'no'. Anyway, long story short, she stood at one end of the paddock and we aimed for her. Didn't get trot, but did get about 5 strides bouncy canter before I flexed to a stop with the halter rope. And I didn't hang on. So we tried again, same result, no trot bouncy excited canter but managed to stop before running Sue over. It unsettled Tal and she went into dancing, head tossing mode, so we just walked around a bit more and when she was calm I got off. I had deliberately not done any on-line work in canter preferring to concentrate on trot, because, being an ex-polo pony/racer/cow-pony she would have always cantered rather than trotted. I had therefore been working on getting a calm trot on-line with head low, hoping that I could re-create that ridden. I still think that should work, but I may have to up the anti and get the canter out of her system first.....
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Post by chrisbetson on Aug 29, 2008 23:41:42 GMT 1
Well done for hanging in there
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Post by rj on Aug 31, 2008 18:40:50 GMT 1
You mean for NOT 'hanging in' there - am really pleased that I didn't pull on the reins this time!
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Post by rj on Sept 17, 2008 16:25:16 GMT 1
Not putting any more on here, it's all on the Tom Widdecombe clinic thread. End of our journey together (my choice, did what I set out to do) and it was bl00dy fantastic.
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