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Post by jen1 on Jan 1, 2008 22:36:34 GMT 1
but horses dont love do they not in the way we humans do, we think they do, but in truth its differant, does the horse need us more that we need them i think we need them more hence me saying parasitic we have a parasitc relatationship with them, not the other way round, im sure you have read up on the balance's of parsitic v symbiotic, bla bla, what i meant to say is to think a horse loves you is more on the side of parasitis, if that make sense,
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Cheryl Walmsley
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Post by Cheryl Walmsley on Jan 1, 2008 22:40:06 GMT 1
yes the fact that Neil jumped back started sherb onto a downward spiral that was hard to "think" him out of so I took physical action and removed the trigger. The thing is, Sherb didn't used to shake me off by doing this sort of thing, I can't work out why I should lose my confidence now, he hasn't really done anything he has never done before. In a way, that's what I'm trying to work out Jen, more to do with myself than Sherb. Anyway, i'm dangerously close to overanalysing this!!!!!!
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Post by jen1 on Jan 1, 2008 22:42:27 GMT 1
lol, you mean you have paralyzed your self,
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Cheryl Walmsley
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Post by Cheryl Walmsley on Jan 1, 2008 22:47:54 GMT 1
something like that!!!!! i got closer than "dangerously" - check out my other thread!!!!! dur!
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Post by june on Jan 1, 2008 22:56:33 GMT 1
Ah ok, so it is the owner you were refering to as the parasite rather than the horse. I get what you are saying now.
I think horses do need us more than we need them, in most cases anyway, but they don't know that so it's irrelevant to them. Mine appreciate being fed hay in the field but they don't see me as their "saviour" for putting it out for them, nor do they love me for it. Its just something that happens every day as far as they are concerned. Guess they could teach us something about over-analysis!
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Cheryl Walmsley
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Post by Cheryl Walmsley on Jan 1, 2008 23:03:06 GMT 1
yes, therein my problem lies. Before last summer I knew very well sherbert didn't love me. Then I suppose over the summer whilst he was really quiet, without realising it, I may have started, subconciously, to look at our relationship in that way. Now he is making it absolutely clear again that he does not, my feelings are hurt, hence my uncharacteristically emotional response (not naturally an emotional person) hence my loss of mojo, hence sherb's constant challenges and in turn my inability to deal with them. This thread has helped me massively. Thanks guys, well, i know i put it up but it was your posts that were helpful!!!
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Post by june on Jan 1, 2008 23:15:17 GMT 1
Mark Rashid said something at one of the clinics I went to which was "deal with the horse you have today". It is something I find quite useful. It is easy to dwell on past issues but if you deal with the horse assuming it is going to behave as you'd like it to then all you have to do is deal with the issue if and when it arises.
We invest enormous emotional energy into our horses and we want them to like us but they aren't politically correct and don't work like that. I think a horse's way of "loving" its owner is having confidence in them and feeling safe and secure with them.
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Post by wozzer on Jan 1, 2008 23:17:42 GMT 1
Same here Vic!! Wozzer, is it possible his "do you still love mum, i'm confused" face, could be, like.....i don't know, maybe, an itchy eyebrow or something?? Is his forelock pretty long?? He he, overanalysation to the max!!!!! *rushing out to check if any of her horses have actually got eyebrows* LOL! xx
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Cheryl Walmsley
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Post by Cheryl Walmsley on Jan 1, 2008 23:20:23 GMT 1
la la, you know what i meant!
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Cheryl Walmsley
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Post by Cheryl Walmsley on Jan 1, 2008 23:21:32 GMT 1
i've heard that quote before June but it's funny how things mean much more at a time when you can apply them to your situation.
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Post by june on Jan 1, 2008 23:31:55 GMT 1
Yes, its that other saying, when the pupil is ready the teacher will appear!
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Post by jen1 on Jan 1, 2008 23:39:37 GMT 1
yes, therein my problem lies. Before last summer I knew very well sherbert didn't love me. Then I suppose over the summer whilst he was really quiet, without realising it, I may have started, subconciously, to look at our relationship in that way. Now he is making it absolutely clear again that he does not, my feelings are hurt, hence my uncharacteristically emotional response (not naturally an emotional person) hence my loss of mojo, hence sherb's constant challenges and in turn my inability to deal with them. This thread has helped me massively. Thanks guys, well, i know i put it up but it was your posts that were helpful!!! but this is something we tryed to show you, in as much not to take things personally, he is but a pony a smart pony, he is just doing what he knows how to do, and he does pick up on your high energy,
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Post by jen1 on Jan 1, 2008 23:43:52 GMT 1
Ah ok, so it is the owner you were refering to as the parasite rather than the horse. I get what you are saying now. I think horses do need us more than we need them, in most cases anyway, but they don't know that so it's irrelevant to them. Mine appreciate being fed hay in the field but they don't see me as their "saviour" for putting it out for them, nor do they love me for it. Its just something that happens every day as far as they are concerned. Guess they could teach us something about over-analysis! in a way they do, because its us that have created them a to need us, if we left them to there own devices without human boundaries I'm sure they would evolve to survive, as they do in the wild, its a massive topic i love to wrangle with maybe we should start a thread,lol
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Post by Susan on Jan 1, 2008 23:55:36 GMT 1
I got told the other day I think too much! which I think is the same..but that is because I want to understand why it was a problem to be able to fix it.. but then sometimes I have to accept perhaps I need to stop all the deep thinking and simply get back on and deal with it..
I think I can relate to Pippa Funnel.. too well and I know she has battled with her nerves and devils.
I also accept horses do not think like us at all.. and they do not rationalise.. they see life as it comes along.. based on their own experiences.
Hey also been there with leg straps a few years back, Flynn suddenly did same one evening and so out of character .. yes my answer was to remove them as I hate them anyway, BUT before I did I worked with him accepting them. I got a friend, IH friendly as well.. and we worked at putting them on and taking them off and indeed Flynn thought he had trained me to not do them by his behaviour for what ever reason. But I decided he wasn't training me, I was going to train him to accept them. We did and then I took them off all of the rugs.. so better gone anyway..
but I think back I also went about asking why did he do that..
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Cheryl Walmsley
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Post by Cheryl Walmsley on Jan 2, 2008 0:44:11 GMT 1
i think it's the most difficult thing to deal with, my high energy, in that, knowing it causes problems and why, doesn't make it go away.
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