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Post by ☼ WIZARD ☼ on Nov 15, 2010 23:21:33 GMT 1
heard it before smithy but still like it.
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Post by gwenoakes on Nov 16, 2010 23:55:01 GMT 1
That was brill Smithy, any more? ROFL
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Post by ☼ WIZARD ☼ on Nov 17, 2010 23:17:41 GMT 1
come on smithy weve got a taste now.
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Post by ☺Smithy☺ on Nov 18, 2010 14:36:57 GMT 1
A young boy went up to his father and asked him, "Dad, what is the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?"
The father thought for a moment, then answered, "Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars, and then, ask your brother if he'd sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Come back and tell me what you learn from that."
So the boy went to his mother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?"
The mother replied, "Of course, I would! We could really use that money to fix up the house and send you kids to a great university!"
The boy then went to his sister and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?"
The girl replied, "Oh, good heavens! I LOVE Brad Pitt and I would sleep with him in a heartbeat. Are you nuts?"
The boy then went to his brother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?"
"Of course," the brother replied. "Do you know how much a million bucks would buy?"
The boy pondered the answers for a few days and then went back to his dad.
His father asked him, "Did you find out the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?"
The boy replied, "Yes, 'Potentially', you and I are sitting on three million dollars, but 'realistically', we're living with two hookers and a future congressman."
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Post by aero on Nov 18, 2010 17:08:46 GMT 1
Brilliant
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Post by ☼ WIZARD ☼ on Nov 18, 2010 20:07:04 GMT 1
ha ha
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Post by HolsBols on Nov 19, 2010 15:08:43 GMT 1
LOL love it!!
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Post by ☼ WIZARD ☼ on Nov 19, 2010 23:37:05 GMT 1
come on hb your turn
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Post by jamesb on Nov 20, 2010 0:05:18 GMT 1
Quite! You must have a store of near-the-knuckle jokes, HB……
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Post by gwenoakes on Nov 20, 2010 13:31:15 GMT 1
Thats brill Smithy and the Tenor ladies came in useful too. ROFL LMAO PMSL LOL LOL LOL.
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Post by jamesb on Nov 20, 2010 16:09:46 GMT 1
TMI, Gwennie
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Post by ☼ WIZARD ☼ on Nov 20, 2010 21:39:21 GMT 1
ive got one but ive forgotten it, will check emails tomorrow and put it on here for you all to share.
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Post by HolsBols on Nov 22, 2010 14:47:05 GMT 1
sorry im not a funny girl! dont know any jokes!
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Post by ☼ WIZARD ☼ on Nov 22, 2010 17:09:50 GMT 1
and we thought you were lol
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Post by ☺Smithy☺ on Nov 22, 2010 17:31:41 GMT 1
Paddy is passing by Mick's hay shed one day when through a gap in the door he sees Mick doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old red Massey Ferguson. Buttocks clenched, he performs a slow pirouette and gently slides off first the right welly, followed by the left. He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move lets his braces fall down from his shoulders to dangle by his hips over his corduroy trousers. Grabbing both sides of his checked shirt, he rips it apart to reveal his tea stained vest underneath and with a final flourish he hurls his flat cap onto a pile of hay. "What the feck are you doing Mick?" says Paddy. "Jeez Paddy, ye frightened the livin bejasus out of me", says an obviously embarrassed Mick, "but me and the missus been having some trouble lately in the bedroom department, and the therapist suggested I do something sexy to a tractor".
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